Answered a question 9/1/2010 at 6:45 pm
Does your mother live with you? My mother moved to Florida 15 years ago against my wishes since I am in California. She is now 91, blind and wheelchair bound and has to be in an assisted living faci
...Read MoreDoes your mother live with you? My mother moved to Florida 15 years ago against my wishes since I am in California. She is now 91, blind and wheelchair bound and has to be in an assisted living facility. She left behind a condo in joint tenancy that I go to when I visit her and am trying to rent out seasonally. She had some money left in her savings, not much, and she went through it in 3 years because she wanted to go out to lunch and get her hair and nails done every other week for which I had to hire an aide. The money is gone and she was abusive to me. I don't call her per dr's orders, since she refuses to accept that she needs to be in the ALF and doesn't have the control of her money like she used to, but there is no way for her to live in the condo and have help - too expensive and you need a family member to supervise. I supervise my 90 year old step-dad out here and he is not demanding, appreciative. I have not called my mom for two weeks, and sometimes it is hard. Will go there in Florida. But I am 64 and need to live my life. My mom dumped me when I was 16 and did her thing. But that's not the point. Even if she was a great mom, I don't need to be abused now. Set boundaries, and get the support you need to deal with it. They always lash out at the children for their misery and fear and inability to be young and do what they used to.
Some mothers abuse their children when they are young, so you are not young and need her to support you, so why do you put up with it?