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Cheryl (Jodigirl1000)
Gender: Female

I am caring for my father, Bob, living at home and the primary ailment is cancer.

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AgingCareTeam gave a hug 11/1/2010 at 1:36 pm

Happy National Family Caregivers Month!

National Family Caregivers month is about honoring yourself as one of the 65 million family caregivers in this country who take care of their loved o ...Read More

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JackieM gave a hug 7/23/2010 at 3:24 pm

Instead of an attack - how about a hug?
I'm so lucky that my aunt is still able to give me thanks, smiles, and hugs (along with many complaints, and "I think I'm going to disappear from the face ...Read More

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Sredding commented 7/23/2010 at 12:30 pm

Thank you - We've been together 44 years -- He has suffered two seizures in the last couple of months - EEG scheduled today - He may be moving into stage 7. I have learned that talking and sharing wh ...Read More

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MaryAnne1 commented 7/23/2010 at 11:56 am

Thank you very much!

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IsabelCares commented 7/23/2010 at 11:49 am

Such positive words you just shared in reply to a post about grieving, Jodigirl. Your words are a real blessing for me today. Hope your day is off to a great start.

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Heatherj43 gave a hug 7/23/2010 at 11:01 am

LOL! Dad didn't need shoes on, unless bro was taking dad to gym also!
Sounds like bro was trying to control and couldn't handle not being able to. Let him go to the gym, "'cuz daddy won't put hi ...Read More

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denisebeltz gave a hug 7/23/2010 at 10:34 am

thanks for the encouragement!

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DanielRomero commented 7/22/2010 at 8:31 pm

Hi, I completely agree with contacting her rep for help and I agree that we need to be advocates for seniors but this forum is not the appropriate place for political opinions...

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DanielRomero commented 7/22/2010 at 7:46 pm

Jodiegirl1000, Liam's message was fine until he spouted a political viewpoint that added nothing constructive to the conversation. He said, "tell them to send the bills to "Obama Care". He's done so m ...Read More

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lynly61 gave a hug 7/21/2010 at 4:07 pm

thanks so much...you dont know how helpful everyones words are.- yours brought tears to my eyes..ive been oblivious to the fact that i am a caregiver...i just thought i was being a daughter...and stru ...Read More

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suzieQ commented 7/21/2010 at 1:02 pm

I agree with the posting below. Just because it was a blessing for you does not mean that others feel the same. All of us are doing our best to take care of our parents....giving time, watching life s ...Read More

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akn64 commented 5/6/2010 at 12:57 pm

You really don't understand. Three years is like nothing compared to years and years most people put in to take care of elderly parents. Your posting is really negative towards those who are trying ...Read More

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beta42 commented 5/6/2010 at 12:52 am

did your dad suffer emotinal distress, fight you off and swear?

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Commented on a discussion 4/23/2011 at 3:45 pm

Why Do Elders Abuse The Relatives Who Are Taking Care of Them?

Care giving is exhausting. And caregivers are often sleep & nutrition deprived. Please be patient with your elderly parents. They are fragile, scared and need you. It doesn't matter whether they are ...Read More

Gave a hug to Sloegin 12/10/2010 at 9:23 pm

The days may seem tough right now. But live in each moment. Cherish each moment. Try very hard to hand off/delegate as much of your stress as you can so that you can enjoy the moments. Big hugs to ...Read More

Answered a question 12/10/2010 at 9:18 am

My husband's Power of Attorney is his cousin. Can he have my husband's SS check and Pension re-routed to an account he sets up for my husband?

Probably. Read the POA. But part of $ probably belongs to you. I would contact social security admin, local state atty general office devoted for elder abuse if you suspect foul play. Good luck

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 9:02 pm

The Jehovah Witness people have been stopping by and visiting with mom regularly. I'm afraid they are aware of her failing memory and are after her money. What Can I do to protect her?

I would be there when the JW's come to visit. I would get their names. If necessary, I would advise the elder protection unit of your state attorney general's office of the issue.
...Read More

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 12:19 pm

How can I get my mom to go the doctor is she refuses but I know she needs a check-up?

I negotiated with my mom. Okay, I sorta lied. I told her we were going out to lunch. Once we were in the car ...

I spoke with doc ahead of time and said that the check up had to be quick ...Read More

Commented on a discussion 7/23/2010 at 12:17 pm

Why Do Elders Abuse The Relatives Who Are Taking Care of Them?

True crow.

"Raising parents" is complicated and messy. Mental illness is sad all the way around and adult children absolutely need support.

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 12:14 pm

How do I make my elderly mom agree to move in with me?

Oh that's tough. Mom does not want to lose her autonomy. I would make sure she has her own space and assure mom that you will give her space. Ask mom to vocalize her concerns. When we moved gma in ...Read More

Commented on a discussion 7/23/2010 at 12:09 pm

"I Secretly Wish My Elderly Mother Would Die"

Alzcaregiver:

I was just plain in shock. And I wondered how he raised 3 daughters! The girls probably only wear sandals. LOL

I like "man up" --- I will use that. thx

Wrote on IsabelCares's wall 7/23/2010 at 12:03 pm

Thank you. I hope you do not have to search too hard to find the joy in today. :-D

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 11:42 am

We are putting my 87-year-old grandma in a nice facility, so why do I feel guilty?

Why feel guilt? The most important person is the ill person and if they are best cared for in a facility that can provide medical care then you are doing a loving thing.
...Read More

Gave a hug to MaryAnne1 7/23/2010 at 11:23 am

Right foot and then left foot. Do something for yourself today! :-D

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 11:23 am

How do I grieve and let go while my mom is still alive?

As adult children, we grieve every decrease in our parent's functioning. There is absolutely no way to grieve the death until it happens --- well you could grieve the death while the parent is alive ...Read More

Gave a hug to Heatherj43 7/23/2010 at 11:12 am

My brother is just a big dope. I love him but he is useless in the care-giving department. He thought that dad (stage 4 cancer and a broken leg) would feel better if he could spend a week or so at t ...Read More

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 11:07 am

Has anyone not genuinely cared the person you have to take care of?

Beautifully said betsymach.

Do something today jsomebody for YOU. Go get an ice cream or watch Jerry Springer or smash the hell out of a pillow. (Jerry Springer works for me bc it shows ...Read More

Answered a question 7/23/2010 at 9:55 am

How do I keep my chin up and get through the frustrations with my mom?

Journal or blog. I get through it by blogging. Bubble baths and prayers help too. Try hard to focus on the positive & dont become negative. Negative thoughts are contagious & hard to rise above. S ...Read More

Commented on a discussion 7/22/2010 at 8:43 pm

Why Do Elders Abuse The Relatives Who Are Taking Care of Them?

Physical abuse? Yes. And it was very hard not to hit back when I was hit by dad. Restraining is tough. There are rules and if any medical care provider gets a sniff of elder abuse . . . ut oh. I ...Read More

Wrote on DanielRomero's wall 7/22/2010 at 8:25 pm

Good point. But much in the same way caregivers have to advocate for our loved ones against hospitals, docs, insurance companies and medicare . . . there is a need to advocate against the federal and ...Read More

Commented on a discussion 7/22/2010 at 7:34 pm

"I Secretly Wish My Elderly Mother Would Die"

Heather . . . I can relate. It is so very frustrating when family members just dont get it. I have a brother like that. He has a wife, 3 daughter (I am sure he changed diapers and tied shoe laces). ...Read More

Answered a question 7/22/2010 at 7:26 pm

My father is in a VA nursing home but his health care is not covered by the VA. He owes about $8,000 after a hospital stay and more bills are piling up. Should I ignore them?

I think Liam is spot on. Unfortunately, the Veterans Administration *is* a very political agency. The VA patients are at the mercy of the direction of the political breeze. If the federal governmen ...Read More

Gave a hug to Sredding 7/22/2010 at 3:47 pm

God bless you for your love and care of your husband. I know from watching my own mom suffer with her husband's illness that it is tough on the spouse. My prayers are with you --- continue to stay s ...Read More

Commented on a discussion 7/22/2010 at 12:46 pm

Why do people die from Alzheimer's Disease?

Alzheimer's disease is a progressive, degenerative disease of the brain where brain cells continue to die over time. There is no cure to stop the progression and eventually the body will shut down. Pe ...Read More

Gave a hug to SoAlone 7/22/2010 at 12:32 pm

God bless you and your patriot dad. It makes me mad that the elderly and families are in this struggle. Thanks VA :P (sarcasm)

Answered a question 7/22/2010 at 9:51 am

How do I tell my mother that her older brother was just diagnosed with liver cancer and hospice was called in?

IMHO it depends on whether mom can handle and process the information. I would ask her doctor. The worst thing would be to make her condition deteriorate.
...Read More

Commented on a discussion 7/22/2010 at 9:43 am

Facing Reality: Caregiving Has Changed Your Life

Thank you for being your mom's advocate and a for sharing your story. You are an inspiration. Cherish every moment God gives you with her!

Wrote on SisterCarrie's wall 7/21/2010 at 9:03 pm

God bless you and your loving care. I held dad's head the last day and told him it was okay to go. He died in my arms and looked so peaceful. Cherish every moment.

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