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DanielRomero

I am caring for my mother, Eloise, living at home and the primary ailment is alzheimer's / dementia.

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Puzzled gave a hug 2/15/2011 at 3:32 pm

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Puzzled gave a hug 2/15/2011 at 3:27 pm

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rstkot gave a hug 1/14/2011 at 6:13 pm

That was a very good answer. Sounds like you may have been there done that!

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AgingCareTeam gave a hug 11/1/2010 at 1:42 pm

Happy National Family Caregivers Month!

National Family Caregivers month is about honoring yourself as one of the 65 million family caregivers in this country who take care of their loved o ...Read More

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Jennie commented 10/8/2010 at 2:48 pm

I believe you took me out of context. I said I HOPED I would be wise enough to know what I could and could not safely do when I am older. And I don't believe that if I am stubborn enough to endanger ...Read More

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MiaMadre commented 9/20/2010 at 2:38 pm

I am glad that my answer helped. There are many times I wonder why "I" am still here (since Mom has passed away) and then I get a thank you from someone such as yourself, and it answers that questio ...Read More

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msdiva commented 9/17/2010 at 3:45 pm

if thats what you thought you did thats fine

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rip commented 8/15/2010 at 12:36 am

Have you been to the "Grossed out" thread?
We are a bit rugged ... but worth a try!

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Reba commented 8/12/2010 at 3:55 pm

Thanks for the hug. Some times it is a thankless job, not by the person you are taking care of but some of the family.

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dayzee4444 gave a hug 7/31/2010 at 5:24 pm

My brother has power of attorney over our mom,,,and the nursing home is listening to him by not letting me see, talk, or send her mail,,and when I call there they tell me she is not there!
...Read More

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ddcox32011 gave a hug 7/26/2010 at 2:59 pm

Thank you. As my mother had her "accident", some snooty ladies at this table were just glaring at us. You'd think none of them ever had an aging parent. How hard would it have been to help out or b ...Read More

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Jodigirl1000 commented 7/22/2010 at 8:25 pm

Good point. But much in the same way caregivers have to advocate for our loved ones against hospitals, docs, insurance companies and medicare . . . there is a need to advocate against the federal and ...Read More

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tweetie1016 gave a hug 6/14/2010 at 3:57 pm

Thank you so much for your kind words and for understanding.

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susanT8403 gave a hug 6/14/2010 at 3:10 pm

so so true!!!!! she sounds like she is on the right path!!!

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IsabelCares gave a hug 5/26/2010 at 1:14 am

For you and your Mom!

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IsabelCares commented 5/26/2010 at 1:14 am

Thanks for your encouragement, Daniel. It means a lot to me. Blessings always to you and your Mom.

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IsabelCares commented 5/18/2010 at 12:58 am

Hi, Daniel! How's your Mom doing?

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lcs commented 4/7/2010 at 10:20 pm

I wondered why all the deer in our front yard had their ears pricked up!!! You must have a nice singing voice. By the way, you have a very musical name. It just rolls off the tongue in a lovely way ...Read More

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AlzCaregiver commented 2/9/2010 at 8:46 pm

I have contacted the lawyer who rep Mom on the original conservator hearings, and she will petition to reopen representing her. We will both independently contact the Court Investigator. She said I ma ...Read More

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AlzCaregiver commented 2/6/2010 at 5:56 pm

Thanks for the referrals. I forgot which post of mine you were referring to. The APS in Santa Clara County has really fouled up Mom's finances, and made me her 24/7 slave...some weeks (usually the har ...Read More

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anonymous13319 commented 1/29/2010 at 8:54 am

Daniel,
Thanks for responding...I will look forward to your comments.
Lilli

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anonymous13319 commented 1/28/2010 at 5:18 pm

Hi Daniel,
I just read your post in the thread, "How can I get my mainipulative 43yr. old brother..." I have a question and did not want to change the direction of the discusssion.
...Read More

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reikibev gave a hug 12/10/2009 at 5:42 pm

You are absolutely right.

Reikibev

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ezcare gave a hug 12/9/2009 at 9:02 pm

As with most people who use this forum, I spoke from my personal experience. My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at the age of76. My father was her primary caregiver in the home they had shared f ...Read More

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Commented on a discussion 8/18/2011 at 1:32 am

Dad's Sense of Reality is Gone. What Do I Do?

When someone with dementia reality is in the past, I have found that it is best not to confuse them more with our reality. "Maybe we can try to get a hold of them tomorrow" is good response, changing ...Read More

Answered a question 3/23/2011 at 3:42 pm

Is there some kind of plastic that can be put on carpeting to direct an 87-year-old with Alzheimer's Disease to the bathroom?

Runners would work if your worried about carpet stains but Depends are probably a better option. An 87 yr old with AD is going to need help each and every time they go to the bathroom. Find the time, ...Read More

Answered a question 3/11/2011 at 12:37 pm

Is amnesia an Alzheimer's symptom?

am·ne·sia
[am-nee-zhuh]
–noun
loss of a large block of interrelated memories; complete or partial loss of memory caused by brain injury, shock, etc.
...Read More

Answered a question 3/9/2011 at 1:02 pm

If I discuss my mom with her doctor, is this conversation confidential or will he tell her?

Why would someone not want the patient know of helpful input to their doctor?

Answered a question 3/4/2011 at 2:29 pm

My mother is in an assisted living facility near my home. Several people have suggested that I make prearrangements for her funeral. I have read pros and cons about this. Does anyone have any experience with this?

Death is inevitable. Even when expected, when the time occurs many emotions are stirred. Preparing for an event that cannot be avoided seems like a good idea.

Answered a question 2/14/2011 at 5:55 pm

How do I deal with my 90-year-old mother who prefers to urinate in diaper rather than go to bathroom? I now have to insist she go to bathroom!

PT, Check and change more. Use a moisture barrier. And there is a foam cleaner cleaner for cleaning the bottom. Depends keep the wearer from the embarrassment of their accident becoming apparent. Chan ...Read More

Answered a question 1/25/2011 at 1:58 pm

I'm worried my brother isn't caring for my mother. When I ask how she is - he yells at me, even threatened to beat me up. I've tried calling her physicians but they won't talk to me. What are my options?

Get on a plane and visit.

Answered a question 1/24/2011 at 7:48 pm

My mom needs to revoke my sister as her POA. Can we do this ourselves or do we have to get an attorney to do this? It needs to be done ASAP.

When your Uncle becomes POA ask him to have your sis to provide an accounting of your mother's money and have all funds acquired after expenses turned over to him. I am a little confused, why does you ...Read More

Answered a question 1/14/2011 at 2:51 pm

My mom needs to revoke my sister as her POA. Can we do this ourselves or do we have to get an attorney to do this? It needs to be done ASAP.

A valid ID and SS # will give her access to bank accounts. Have your mother tell her boss that she wants her paychecks handed to her and that she wants NO financial info provided to your sister.

Wrote on italianbabs's wall 1/14/2011 at 2:15 pm

Hi, it sounds like your mother is confident. Take her to the bank, SSA and any other financial place and tell them that the POA is invalid and the your sister should not be allowed access to her money ...Read More

Wrote on Jennie's wall 10/8/2010 at 1:52 pm

I saw your comment, "when I am lucky enough to reach an advanced age I will be wise enough to be realistic about what I can and cannot safely do. ".... If I am lucky enough to be old and wise I will h ...Read More

Answered a question 10/8/2010 at 12:53 pm

My sisters and I have asked my Mom not to drive anymore. She is listening to us but laying so much guilt on us, how do we not give in to her and her guilt trip?

If your Mother was a danger to herself and others then you did the right thing. You would not give keys to a car to a drunk. Knowing you did what was right should alleviate the guilt. Having your Moth ...Read More

Answered a question 9/30/2010 at 2:20 pm

I need Power of Attorney, but my mother can't even sign her name and she will never agree to signing her life over to me. What's the best way to deal with this?

if money is a problem, you can call the Bar Association in your area and get a cheap consult...

Wrote on MiaMadre's wall 9/20/2010 at 1:47 pm

Great answer to the "unplug the bed" question. I have been caring for my mother with AD for 12 + years.but sometimes frustration sets in and it is nice to hear the basics of how to handle something. T ...Read More

Answered a question 9/20/2010 at 1:39 pm

My mom insists the bed is burning and wants me to unplug it. How can I get her to stay in her bed at night?

Unplug the bed....do something to make her believe you unplugged the bed...don't confuse her any more than she already is....and of course take her to the doctor to see if it's dementia or is actually ...Read More

Wrote on msdiva's wall 9/17/2010 at 3:22 pm

Hello Diva, My answer was helpful. I did think N1 comment was insensitive. I also thought that anyone who has cared for an AD sufferer would know how frustrating it is. I did not insult or be rude bec ...Read More

Answered a question 9/17/2010 at 2:12 pm

My mother’s dementia is getting worse, how much longer does she have to stay at home before she drives everyone crazy?

I'll ignore N1's comments and try to answer your question. The answer is as long as you can remain sane, healthy and fulfilled.
The question of when to say I've done all I can and it is time that ...Read More

Answered a question 9/13/2010 at 11:41 pm

How do I help mom control her spending if I don't have Power of Attorney?

I wrote without looking at your page...I am sorry...you need to seek legal advice....my mother was diagnosed with AD/dementia at an early stage and she was much too trusting...getting a POA while your ...Read More

Answered a question 8/14/2010 at 1:08 pm

My husband has Alzheimer’s and doesn’t want to eat. Should I force him to eat??

Reba,
You are right. There is not anything to stop the progression of AD but death. You are doing a great job. I agree with Lilli, feed him what he will eat and keep him comfortable. When diagno ...Read More

Gave a hug to Reba 8/12/2010 at 11:59 am

Hi Reba, I take care of my mother who has AD an it is difficult. I can not imagine how difficult it would be to take the AD journey with the one who built a life. Good luck in all you do.

Answered a question 8/12/2010 at 11:53 am

My husband has Alzheimer’s and doesn’t want to eat. Should I force him to eat??

Reba, I am a spiritual person and believe in an afterlife. I also believe that death for a severe AD sufferer is freedom, sunshine on a rainy day. You are a strong woman and your husband is extremely ...Read More

Answered a question 8/5/2010 at 1:19 pm

Tying to stop my mom with Alzheimer's from wandering makes her aggressive. What am I supposed to do?

These are web sites are somewhat redundant but there is some good info....

http://www.alz.org/national/documents/topicsheet_wandering.pdf
...Read More

Answered a question 8/4/2010 at 3:55 pm

How do you deal with an elderly dementia patient who thinks someone is coming in at night and stealing her clothes?

Try to change the subject...but don't confuse her anymore by trying to reason with her...I would agree and say let's go look and see what is missing and then while looking change the subject to someth ...Read More

Answered a question 8/4/2010 at 3:50 pm

How do you cope with a mother who is starting to have more and more day-time bathroom accidents?

Reminders, depends and your caring attitude....geez...I can't offer any suggestions but keep doin' what your doin'...keep that caring attitude and God given patience...good luck...I'm sorry I didn't h ...Read More

Answered a question 7/30/2010 at 1:18 pm

My mom is in a nursing home and my brother is the POA. If he will not let me see her, can the nursing home refuse to let me visit?

Unless there is a restraining order preventing you from contacting your mother, your brother has no legal right to prevent you from contacting your mother.

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