Commented on a discussion 1/1/2012 at 11:42 pm
Hey, Windy, Christina, Lilliput and others.....Yes, we did the count-down last night to midnight and there was nothing but positive spirit in the room....just what the doctor ordered like you said. (-:
...Read MoreHey, Windy, Christina, Lilliput and others.....Yes, we did the count-down last night to midnight and there was nothing but positive spirit in the room....just what the doctor ordered like you said. (-:
Christina, your suggestions of the little things really resonates with me. As my Dad recedes further into dementia, I am noticing that what you say is so true. it really doesn't take anything grand to make him happy. He and I have a favorite activity where I pull up a chair and look through his cards with him....he saves all his correspondence to show me. You mentioned the See's candy....My Dad likes that too! (we get him the sugar-less kind), And then the "extra kiss" you mentioned...what a beautiful, tender idea.
There is something I am noticing that is happening which I never knew could or would happen.....For three years, since Mom's death, I have been caring for Dad, and his dementia has steadily gotten worse. It is getting harder and harder to "get through" to him and to exchange love....at least it FEELS like it's harder to exchange love. But lo and behold, just recently I am aware of the fact that my relationship with my father has actually grown and deepened, even as there seems to be so little "real" relating going on. When I think back on the times when I'd leave his room and sit in the stairwell and cry, thinking " He is suffering from dementia and cannot experience the emotion and joy he once could, and is more prone to loneliness and depression.....Why?"..... But then, as caregivers, we can look back and see that over time our relationship with our loved one has been as important as ever. And that love HAS been exchanged, even though we can't always see it.