Work and the Emotional Costs of Caring for Your Mom and Dad

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Work Issues

Making matters worse, caring for aging parents often impacts adult children at their workplace as well. The survey found: 

  • 43% have had to take time off work due to caregiving responsibilities.
  • 48% say they are earning less money at work as a result of caregiving.
  • 25% have been fired or had to quit their job as a result of caregiving.

One survey respondent says, "I am unable to earn the income needed to continue caring for both my parents and my own family. I've not only given up my job, but my dreams, for now. It is very lonely and financially difficult. But I have to do what is right."

Physical and Emotional Toll

Despite potentially making less money and doling out more, more than half of the caregivers surveyed are spending what equates to a full-time work week – 40 hours or more – on caregiving duties, many in addition to their full-time careers outside the home:

  • 53% of caregivers provide care 40 or more hours per week.
  • 37% provide care more than 80 hours per week.
  • 21% say they never get a break from caregiving.
  • 36% get a break of 5 hours or less a week.

The survey indicates that today's caregivers face a triple financial threat: unplanned-for caregiving expenses, less money for their own needs and reduced time in the workplace.

 
 

Comments

 
  •  Comments 1 to 5 of 5 
 
 

ChasingChaos

Give a Hug

Oct 29, 2008

My aunt recently passed away. A week ago to be exact. I have been her caregiver for the past 6 months, 24/7 with the assistance of my partner who also lives here. My uncle who is her nephew was put on her advance care directive as the person to make her decisions should she not be able to. In this six month period I have seen him 2 times. (as she has) He wasn't even aware that I was her for the first three weeks. My Aunt and her Doctor made an agreement in August that she would render the responsiblilies of paying bills, writing checks etc to me. She was in her sound mind when she did this. However, there was never any legal statement of this. My uncle, (well his wife actually) has now decided that I was commiting a crime. Here is my problem with this.....where was he when the electric was about to get turned off? Or when she would fall in the middle of the night? Who dispensed her meds, reminded her what day it was, changed her diaper, spoon fed her? watched her die? Now I haven't been given 5 minutes to grieve and I am already under attack.

Do I have any legal rights in this matter or am i just a criminal?
HELP

 
 

care4rparents

Give a Hug

Oct 29, 2008

This is something that I hope our politicians will address in the near future.We, as caregivers should also become more active in spreading awareness about this crisis. I want to add that Medicare only covers about 100 days in a nursing facility after a doctor deems the stay necessary. If you're looking at long term care such as: hiring caregiving agencies, residential board and care facilities or assisted living, it's all out-of-pocket. This is the stress that we have and currently there are no easy solutions for. Respite care helps, but it's not enough.

~Rose Broyles

 
 

care4rparents

Give a Hug

Oct 29, 2008

ChasingChaos, I'm sorry for your loss. Advanced Directives only apply to medical decisions. A living trust and/or Power of Attorney is what you would have needed to legally take over her finances. I don't think you were committing a crime. For it to be criminal, you would have had to commit some kind of financial abuse. But to be sure you should consult an Attorney.

 
 

Yolanda

Give a Hug

Jul 28, 2009

Hello - I have written before about my mom's caregiving expenses and have started the ball rolling so to speak on seeing if my mom will quality for what they call Medi-Medi program. She is 80 years of age, had a stroke 4 years ago, 24 hr. care required right now, living with my husband and I, owns no property. Initially I was taking care of her for around a month full time til I got very ill. We went through an agency, that became a hassle because their caregiver's were unreliable. We met a wonderful caregiver who we are paying "under the table". That is the only way we are able to keep someone affordable, is reliable, and my mom likes her. We also trust her, she is like family.
The problem (maybe): The Social Worker will be coming out. She has taken my husband's and my Soc. Security numbers. They mentioned seeing bank statements. Will they be inspecting for payments going out for caregiving expenses over the past year or so? It may be a problem for us.
thanks, from O.C. California

 
 

LindaGS

Give a Hug

Jan 27, 2012

I learned how to pay my hired help over the table last year. i am grateful I did because she became like family and when i had to let her go when I lost my job she could collect unemployment.

 
  •  Comments 1 to 5 of 5 

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