Advance care planning is the process of discussing, determining and executing treatment directives - such as a Living Will, and appointing a health care proxy decision maker for care in the event that a person is not able to make medical decisions for him or herself. Advance Care planning can make a critical difference in your life, and the lives of your parents as they age, either in emergency situations or when facing end-of-life care situations.
To be most effective, advance care planning needs to be a comprehensive, ongoing process that includes your family and friends, your proxy, and your providers. Planning should reflect your elderly parent's personal values and beliefs, and be adaptable if circumstances change. Communication is the single most important first step in advance care planning. It is critical to consider what mom and dad want while they have time to think through the options clearly, and then to discuss the options and preferences with family.
While advance care planning may be difficult and emotionally charged, communicating your parent's wishes ahead of time decreases the chance of future conflict and takes the burden off the family. Several issues should be carefully considered for advance care planning.
Values and beliefs. Personal concerns, values, spiritual beliefs or views about what makes life worth living are important issues to consider when developing an advance care plan.
Preferences. Most people have ideas about the ways they wish to face death and/or disability, but may be uncomfortable discussing them. Sometimes sharing your own ideas, if you are helping someone, or reviewing the situations of other family or friends who have been in relevant situations can help.
Health care proxy: Decide who mom or dad will appoint as their health care proxy (surrogate or agent) decision-maker. Appointing a single proxy is a very important decision. The person they choose as a proxy needs to be able to make decisions based on understanding and respecting their values and beliefs about care. Select someone who mom or dad believes will understand and be able to carry out their wishes even if they include denying life-sustaining treatments. Some parents have inadvertently put their families through agony by avoiding the subject.
Help with Planning. Many different kinds of professionals can assist you in creating advance directives that help ensure that your elderly parent's wishes will be respected. Lawyers, social workers and members of the clergy are obvious examples. Some counselors and social workers – especially those who work for hospice services – are uniquely qualified to offer guidance at all stages of the advance care planning process.