Easier said then done.... my family member likes to set you up and then complain about everything for the last 50 years...she never takes the blame for anything... criticizes and then spreads stories to her friends to make us look bad...everyone knows her behavior but are afraid to say anything, because she is loud and vugar.
(6)
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I have to add a few words to this subject because of personal experience. The first time I had to deal with someone who HAD to be right was when I lived with my brother for a few months of "re-location." My mother said that I would need to be "condescending" for this temporary living situation to work. I had come to realize my mom had gained a lot of practical "wisdom," and followed her advice. Whenever my brother and I would start to disagree or I became aware of getting into "I'm Right," territory, I took a condescending attitude and it ALWAYS worked., avoiding conflict, anger and fighting. I really didn't matter to me (being right) and it really was important to him...so why not? Having to "be right," seems more of a character flaw..a handicap, and when I changed my attitude, our relationship improved. My brother didn't know the real reason we got along....He just thought I had changed, (we both changed) and our relationship improved from that time on. My mother was also a challenge for me...she had to have the "last word." I had not realized it was an issue. One day, she grew agitated and asked me why did I "always have to have the last word?" I was suddenly aware.... having the last word was important to HER, not to me....I became more aware when she needed to "have the last word.' Our relationship improved..! I changed my attitude and gave up something that she needed and was not important to me.....Why not?
(8)
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If your mother always has to be right, let her be. A simple "I don't agree with you, but you're probably right." might end it. How can she argue if you're saying she's right? That could be a matter of maintaining some control of her life, or arguing and being right is how she's always been.
(4)
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