My Mother is 88 and has COPD. I've been caring for her, driving her to the Dr.,cleaning her house,maintaining her property,etc,etc,etc. since 2009 as I cared for my Dad who had broke his hip and elbow and died in my arms in 2010.I worked part-time at a job I loved and it also kept my level of sanity. Her Pulminoligist always advised her, even though it was an effort, to keep moving.I July of 2013 she decided to stay in bed. Period. She just gave up, wouldn't take any of her Meds and wouldn't do ANYTHING to help herself. Now almost 6mons. later I have the help of Hospice (thank-you God) been forced to quit my job and am at her beconed call (which is a portable doorbell). Last night @ 2:30am she rang me and I was a little slow to wake up. When I got to her she confused and asked me "why can't I walk to the bathroom?" I told her "you have atrophy, you havn't moved your legs in 4 or 5 mons. and your muscles are too weak now". Needless to say she lashed out at me accusing me of calling her a facker and saying it was my fault as I never did anything to help her. The only thing I was good for is shoving the bed pan under her and leaving it there untile I felt like taking it out, and on and on. And "do you think I'm punishing you?"(I felt like saying that it feels like it and that at 62yrs. I don't think you could punish me anymore than you already have, especially at 2:30 am...lol)
I need to say, the reason I came here, after my Dad broke his hip is because she was VERY mean to him and would scream at him to move, which was very painful. She felt it wasn't fair to her, she wanted to go out and travel and do things and now she couldn't because of him. She would say it was punishment for her. So I took over and I'm glad I did.
She is of sound mind and a very narsassistic and controling woman,I get that. But it was her choice to be bedridden and helpless.She's recently been talking about diapers because it's to hard to get on the bedpan...REALLY?