DLJ, your profile info is important to the responses, so I am putting it here:
"Veteran, had congestive heart failure last September. Also have torn rotator cuff right shoulder probably left as well, also all cartilage left knee gone. Have doctors appointments hospital surgical appointments pretty much can take care of myself except for the occasional shower and preparing food. Transportation to and from appointments also difficult. In addition my ex-wife who currently I live with is bipolar and the stress of my illness and the day to day care she provides has & is stressing her out to the max she needs mental assistance as well, therefore I need someone outside the family provide my needs. "
Have you checked the VA? I feel like I need to make a frank observation: - you need help prepping healthy meals - you need help showering (occasionally) - you need transportation to appointments and in general - you need a dependable, qualified, affordable person to help you
You don't mention your age. But what must be considered is that as we age, even without the health challenges that you have, abilities decline -- they don't return, improve or stay the same. You are viewing your needs as if they are never going to change. And then what about if you experience cognitive decline as well? Going into a care community on Medicaid (or the VA) may be your wisest option. You will get the care you need and will be among other people. Hiring in-home care can be a revolving door (and makes you an employer in the eyes of the govt) and can be socially isolating. I realize this probably isn't what you want to hear, but I beg you to be realistic and consider this long view. Thank you for your service! I hope you can find a solution that is the right fit for you.
You need to call your County VA dept. Ask what kind of help is out there for you. If low income, try Medicaid for in home help. Since wife is ex, her income should not be considered. Also, Office of Aging.
"Veteran, had congestive heart failure last September. Also have torn rotator cuff right shoulder probably left as well, also all cartilage left knee gone. Have doctors appointments hospital surgical appointments pretty much can take care of myself except for the occasional shower and preparing food. Transportation to and from appointments also difficult. In addition my ex-wife who currently I live with is bipolar and the stress of my illness and the day to day care she provides has & is stressing her out to the max she needs mental assistance as well, therefore I need someone outside the family provide my needs. "
Have you checked the VA? I feel like I need to make a frank observation:
- you need help prepping healthy meals
- you need help showering (occasionally)
- you need transportation to appointments and in general
- you need a dependable, qualified, affordable person to help you
You don't mention your age. But what must be considered is that as we age, even without the health challenges that you have, abilities decline -- they don't return, improve or stay the same. You are viewing your needs as if they are never going to change. And then what about if you experience cognitive decline as well? Going into a care community on Medicaid (or the VA) may be your wisest option. You will get the care you need and will be among other people. Hiring in-home care can be a revolving door (and makes you an employer in the eyes of the govt) and can be socially isolating. I realize this probably isn't what you want to hear, but I beg you to be realistic and consider this long view. Thank you for your service! I hope you can find a solution that is the right fit for you.
https://www.piercecountywa.gov/1986/Aging-and-Disability-Resources