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I read in answers to another question that if I tell the hospital staff I can no longer care for my mom they are responsible to find her a place. Is this true if she is on Medicare and Medicaid. She has advanced dementia, IBS, incontinence. I can not get out of her sight until she comes looking for me. My health and mental strength are suffering.

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Ambriel, the links are about money, instead of servitude. Filial responsibility states are really only concerned with the children footing the bill for the parents' care. They don't insist that the child do the work.

With the inflated cost of elder care in the US, it wouldn't take long for all the assets of the elders and their children would be gone. Everything really comes back to the inflated cost of elder care and general healthcare in the US. I do wish the wealthier people in the country were more for people and less for themselves. There's only so much the taxpayers and family caregivers can give to make sure elders are taken care of.
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Here is some good reading on the Filial Responsibility" law, which appears to predate the constitution even.

http://www.assisted-living-atlanta.com/downloadc/71629/

and, http://www.lawfirms.com/resources/nursing-home/filial-responsibility

and this is a really good one, http://www.regent.edu/acad/schlaw/blogs/docs/filiallaws.pdf

Apparently, they are dusting off the statute and taking another look at it here in Georgia and probably every other state too.
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The 13th Amendment of the US Constitution was ratified in 1865. It states "Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction." So unless being born is a crime, it is a violation of a person's civil rights to say they have to personally take care of someone.

On the moral side of things, it is the children's responsibility to make sure that the parent is being cared for. But an individual child cannot be forced to do the work themselves in the US. To tell an adult child that they will be arrested if they don't take the possession of a parent is really blackmail. I don't know what I would do if faced with this type of blackmail.
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Jamiegth, I know how you feel...after trying to find a place for my mom this past week I had to accept the unwelcome realization that I am have to keep her in my home whether I want to or not. It's cheaper to keep her, per say because she only gets $1000 per month and the level of care she needs is $3000+. Although she has owned nothing in the past five years, I can't cover the extra cost of a personal care facility and the doctor won't do anything other than order some home health care for a limited amount of time. This is very difficult to accept. I want to take care of my mother and I have her best interest at heart, but I can't be her constant companion. I have a family that needs me to. I thought if I got her into a facility the activities there would be good for her and improve her quality of life. It's all left to me and there is just not enough of me to go around. I just can't stop thinking that my life has come to this and I don't look forward to the years ahead. I can't even take a vacation because I can't leave her alone and I spend all my extra money on her needs and wants. It's difficult.
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The hospital will find a place for her and the she will become a Ward of the State. The state will initiate a Medicaid application.
If you live in a state with "Filial Responsibility" laws, you may still be sued for the cost of her care if any assets were transferred to you within the 5 years prior to the Medicaid application date.
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I dont have guardianship of my dad. But when he went off the deep end, partially due to medication changes. He had me investigated by APS. So when the hospital called for me to come get him, you can imagine my apprehension. And yes, they did make me feel as though if i didnt, it was going end up with an elderly abandonment charge.
No charges were ever filed,,, however, i now live under his constant scrutiny and manipulation that if hes not getting his way, he'll falsely make accusations again. Its very draining and unfair to my three young kids, my husband and his mother who also lives with us.
My dads a quadroplegic, and i take great care of him. But its crap that he wants me to load him up and haul him to the store just becuz im using his money to buy milk and bread. Its a lot of heavy lifting for my 5'1" frame, just to get some basic neccesities. I understand hes bored, but he needs to understand that just his basic 24/7 care is demanding enough without the expectation of me having to entertain him as well.
The social worker told me that there is no such thing as being a ward of the state,,, except for if charges were brought against me by the state :(
So im damned if do and damned if i dont. A skilled nursing facility wants 7,000.00 a month for someone with his level of care. He only gets 3,000.00 a month.
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Unless you are your mothers guardian you can refuse to take her home siting an inability to care for her as her needs require. Seems like the tendency is for them to make you think this is not an option and full-court pressure you into taking her home. It takes a strong will and determination to stand up to this but indeed they can not force you to bring her home with you.
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