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As the sole provider and supplier for my home, I am not in support of my wife acceptance of POA for her parents. This has and will require a large amount of time and resources extended from my home. The relationship is very strained between myself and my inlaws. Can I legally prevent her from being the agent of the POA. Her father is living on reverse mortgage and credit cards and I am very concerned as my wife is not very legally minded. She refuses to revoke her standing. What can I do? tnx,

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Babalou,

Well, if you signed your name as "financially responsible party", that is completely different than acting under the scope of a POA, but it still does not make you liable for the debt. Depending on the financial institution you use, the hospital, care center, etc., they may have a certain way they want you to execute the forms, but the only thing I would advise you to write is your name, followed by "attorney in fact". The two proper legal ways of writing would be the following: "Dorothy Doe, by Jane Doe under Power of Attorney" or "Jane Doe, attorney-in-fact for Dorothy Doe." You don't want to just forge someone's signature, but the legal reality is that signing your name, even without the POA acknowledgment, has no bearing at all on whether or not you as the POA are liable for any debt, liability, etc. The truth is you are going to here 50 different answers from people who want you to sign at different hospitals, banks, institutions, etc., and it is good if you can find out how they want you to execute the documents, especially if they have written procedures, but that is really the facilities own personal preference and has nothing to do with the actual law.

The POA is not different than someone who has established a legal trust. Unless you act illegally and open an account in the grantor's name (for instance a credit card) that you use personally, then you absolutely have no liability whatsoever for the debts of another person. You do not become the other person because of the POA, you simply have the ability to execute documents and make financial decisions that are in the best interest of the grantor, nothing else. If a bank wants you to sign as a cosigner on a loan or bank account before they will allow you to write or sign checks, refuse and have the power of attorney handy, as the bank must honor that POA. In fact, even the bank asking you to join the account or cosign in your personal capacity is illegal in every state.
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shagster1, you don't like your in-laws, and maybe that is fully justified. But presumably you do like your wife. For her sake, try to be supportive of her in this difficult time.
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Babalou, I do the same thing when it comes to payments. Often Mom doesn't really grasp what she is signing, but I know she is the one responsible for paying, so I tell her just to sign by the X. I wouldn't lead her wrong and it solves any future problem.

ff, what you wrote is true when you have to sign something. I remember having to write PR (personal representative) when my mother was signing as executor of my father's will. And yes, I would tell her just to sign by the X. She ought to be glad that I wouldn't lead her wrong. :)
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I also was advised that when I was POA for both my parents, any time I signed for either one of them I had to at least write "POA" after my signature.
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Truth, I've 9been advised differently. That if I signed my named as " financially responsible party" whether or not i had PoA, i would be potentially responsible for rehab/ nh bills. Thus, if mom was conscious, id have her sign. Jf not, i say, " wait for my brother. He has poa". So far, no one has left us at the curb. But that is where I'dstay.
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I feel shagster has a power problem. Maybe he is more interested in losing his wifes time and attention ? He says he has issues with the ILs.. how would he feel if it was his folks and she objected?
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No, they are not responsible for the hospital bill. In no state in the union is it even required to write "power of attorney" or "POA" after signing your name. Leave the legal questions for people who actually went to law school. Having a power of attorney has NOTHING TO DO with liability for financial debts, period.
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I agree with frequflyer. It is certainly not his decision to make, and it does not make the person with the POA responsible for any of their debt.
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The power of attorney does not in any way make you responsible for any of your mother's debts. The only way you could be held financially responsible for a debt is if you are named as an owner or a co-signer on the account or loan. POA simply do not work the way most people are asserting. Again, having a power of attorney does not make on liable for any type of financial transaction, no matter how she signs a document. Writing POA has no legal effect whatsoever on whom is responsible for a debt.
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I can understand shagster's concerns. Should his wife sign a document and forget to put POA after her name, suddenly she is responsible for a hospital bill or a doctor bill or a nursing home bill. It could get messy.
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Or someone who is still living in the 1950's.
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It is up to your wife whether to help her father or not. It will involve your wife's time and her father's resources. You do not need to be involved. What country is your original home? I get the feeling that we are speaking across cultures.
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Your wife having a power of attorney has nothing to do with you, and it is not your decision to make. It is literally between her and her parents. The fact that you are willing to take your own wife to court in order to try and prevent her from taking care of her parents is very telling about you, and I honestly can't believe you would be willing to do such a thing (even if you could, which you can't) just because you are upset with your inlaws. It is not about you, and I don't blame her for not giving in to your ridiculous demands. Leave her alone and let her take care of her parents.
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Shag, it sounds as though there is a complicated backstory here; care to tell it?
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No, you cannot legally prevent your wife to be her parents Power of Attorney. If her parents wants her to be POA, that is the parent's choice as they have confidence in their daughter to do the right thing regarding their care and finances.

What you need to do is step back and let your wife proceed as Power of Attorney. It doesn't matter if her parents have a reverse mortgage and credit card debt, it doesn't come out of your pocket nor your wife's. Her parents are the only one liable for any debts.

As I re-read your post, it sounds like you wouldn't even let your own wife be your Power of Attorney because she's not legally minded. Are you yourself an attorney?
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Your wife having PoA does not mean that she is accepting any financial responsibility for her parent. Make sure that neither of you signs any documents that indicate that you accept financial responsibility for her parent. She should sign as " Jane Doe, in her capacity as PoA for......."

The fact that she is poa does not mean that they move into your home. Your wife can arrane for their care. She can call the local Area Agency on Aging to find out what resources are available.
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