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No one should be talking to sister if she does not have POA. Dad has to verbally, at least, to give permission over the phone.

Social Security does not except POAs. You need to call them and give a reason why sister should not have payee. I would think you need to put in writing why you do not want to be payee anymore and why. My sister's pension is government and my nephew collects on it. The pension works just like SS. Mom was payee for nephew. When she, because of Dementia, could not be payee I had to write a letter explaining why Mom could no longer handle the responsibility and why I was applying for it.

Curious to why your son is involved in all of this and Dad. Why do they feel they are the best Caregivers of Grandma. Money?
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