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He feels very sleepy 2 hrs after eating. He seems to be in a downward spiral where he has no energy, yet doesn't feel very hungry. Therefore he doesn't eat much, which doesn't give him fuel....(I tried explaining this to him). He says he feels better after he eats, but then after about 2 hours he suddenly feels very sleepy again. He keeps loosing weight and muscle mass. His balance is getting worse, so he hunches over when he walks (sometimes with a walker) so he won't fall backwards. Generally speaking, this is a man who was very physically active until about age 75. He's had 2 hip replacements, recovered okay from them. My mother passed away almost 5 years ago. The first 2 years he seemed physically okay, the 3 year he slowed down a little and moved to an independent living facility. Year 3 even more so and now on year 5 he seems to be rapidly declining. He says he shouldn't be this way and has sent me the task to "look up on the computer" what is wrong with him.

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When they don't want to do anything?
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There are some great exercise routines that can be done from a chair on youtube. I do them with my husband. It helps you to stay fit and off your feet/knees.

youtube/watch?v=m7zCDiiTBTk
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My dad is almost 93 (in August) and is healthier than I am with one exception.....he has lost weight in the last year. He now weighs in a whopping 114 (he's 5'1") He has never weighed this little and has always been very athletic . He eats like a truck driver, does everything his dr. tells him to do including drinking a can of Ensure everyday and having a pnut butter and jelly sandwich in the afternoon just to keep what little weight he has left and possibly put some on him. We JUST went to the dr. on Monday and she said the same thing about muscle mass. He has lost so much and that as we all know muscle weighs more than fat. He still gets around "pretty" good with walker but just can't stand for very long or walk very far. He still drives (drives better than he walks) and uses a motorized cart at stores. I got him some 2lb weights to start doing some arm curls and knee bends if he can to try to build up some type of muscle. And I agree with Igloo, I would definitely be there at all drs. appts. and get them on board and on the same page if not already. I go to ALL appts. (God help me) because I wouldn't get the straight story if I didn't go. He can't hear very well at all so he gets everything backwards as hard as he tries. Good Luck and God Bless....
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GJ - your dad is in IL, correct? I'd suggest that you have a scheduled chat with the activities director / co-ordinator and the on-sitevmanager to get their perspective on dad. All IL are different but most have exercise class, craft class, movie night, field & shopping trips and on a set schedule that residents get in their calendar. Is dad participating? Does he have a pal or buddy? Ask if he perhaps needs a higher level of care.

When he goes to see an md, are you there and getting details firsthand?

One issue with my mom was that she had 5 different MDs, all giving out Rx's & dealing with specific & increasing complaints. She wasnt actively listening to any of them either. She tore rotor cuff so saw Otho surgeon. He required because of age (almost 90) to be cleared by gerontology dept at health science center where he was on staff.. Not her internist or old family medicine doc but gerontology dept. Totally different approach starting with cognition tests, then a stopping or weaning off of her various Rx's, cardiology work up, etc. everything done by gerontology md or specialists within dept. all reporting centralized. Mom stayed seeing them after surgery about every 6 mos with cognition testing each visit. She was diagnosed with lewy body dementia. It was good to know as lewy has a somewhat different dementia decline in the first stages. There was no way her old docs would have been able to evaluate her, their approach was to prescribe something to cure which is what most medical school & residency training is all about. For elderly with dementia "cure" isn't going to happen, it more about long term management of a chronic and terminal disease.

If you can find a gerontology program, try to get dad an appointment for a full work up and be there taking notes.
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Maybe when you are his age and have done the things that he has, you will understand why he feels like that.."old age"
My only advice is keep his mind stimulated..what about a new hobby like skydiving
that will get his eyes and his mind open
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GJ, I think a lot of us could write a book.....maybe even a series. :)) Good Luck....
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Also agree on making sure he gets enough protein and water. But in small amounts during the day. Preparing snacks in small amounts ahead of time for him to nibble on during the day has been more effective for us than large meals. We've also gone down to 2 meals/day (plus snacks) as he eats a late breakfast and retires early. The problem with being sedentary is you also get constipated.
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My father also used to keep himself in pretty good shape (runner) but has arthritis in his knees now that have significantly reduced his mobility. He doesn't trust his legs to support him and is afraid of falling, so he looks down all the time, resulting in the hunching over. I've explained to him that this increases his chance of falling, but can't break through his instinct. (Has moderate dementia.) He does well with a walker alone but requires significant assistance with a cane, which he still insists on using upon occasion. A brace would not help and might be uncomfortable. He says he isn't hungry and doesn't eat or exercise on his own but has a surprisingly good appetite if someone fixes food and eats with him. He will also go to the gym and exercise in a limited fashion with a companion or he will walk (grudgingly) to accomplish an errand, such as take out the trash. He's been through PT - it made him stronger - but he didn't keep it up the exercises even though we tried to tease him into it. I agree you should get a blood panel from his doctor to pinpoint any possible physical issues, but I'm guessing the source is loneliness and depression and I'm advocating companionship first over medication.
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My dad is almost 93 and doesn't nap that long. He might fall asleep in front of the tv after lunch or take a nap in bed but it will only be for an hour or so. He is also losing muscle mass. Elderly do it seems even if they exercise regularly. I do agree with the rest about getting a full work up and watching his diet. At my father's retirement place they fix the big meal at noon. I don't know about you but I can't eat a full meal at noon because I will have to take a nap....think about Thanksgiving or any other holiday where you eat more than you can handle. At this age metabolisms slow way down and they can't process as quickly and then it's time to go eat again. Maybe a smaller meal at lunch and dinner would help him with energy. I got my dad some 2lb. weights also to do while watching tv. But I also agree that at an older age deserves to do what they want to do. However, I would get him checked out for sure first. Good Luck and God Bless
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Thank you everyone for so many suggestions! There are other details that I did not share that he already tried that you had suggested, for example, he has tried some anti-depressants, but had suicidal side effects from them and stopped taking them immediately! If I wrote every single detail, it would be a book. I am planning to encourage him to see his PCP and look into diabetes, oesteoporases, a back brace, some exercise even if very little and snacking for more carlories. I have a few of your other idea in mind, and will refer back to this thread again as he tries some changes to see if they will help. I think generally, at age 83, declining health can be expected, but if he wants to try to make things better, then that's good! God bless!
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Boost and EnSure are loaded with HFCS (second ingredient after water), not the healthiest option. Google and watch The Bitter Truth about Sugar, then decide for yourself. Water and mild teas probably the best. Sometimes just placing a tumbler within reach is enough to encourage healthy water consumption.
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Unfortunately if you don't use it you lose it... It's the chicken and egg thing. Can he affirmed Physical Therapy? Make sure he is drinking enough fluids. Most elderly people do not drink enough water (soda doesn't help). Lack of fluids causes lethargy, weakness, confusion etc. Keep track of his fluid I take and try Boost.
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Getting enough protein (not enough can relate to loss of muscle) and enough activity when mobility decreases can be a real challenge. As a caregiver, I found that offering cut up apple slices with peanut or almond butter spread on slices made a perfect mid morning or afternoon snack. My clients loved it and looked forward to. High in natural sugar and tasty, also had the side effect of keeping b.m.s regular. Men in particular are hesitant to use walkers or canes, but with encouragement will usually appreciate ability to get around. Some physical therapists will give directives to walk around the house, to the end of the street, something very doable that is short and can be increased to rebuild strength and may be worth a try. Walking (guardian angel style) along side someone can increase trust and feeling of safety if that is on concern. Also creates a time for discussion about past or other things of interest. My dad went very quickly from atherosclerosis and I never had the opportunity to do this with him, so know that this opportunity you have is very precious. Hope this is helpful.
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The loss of muscle mass has nothing to do with sleeping.Iti does have a lot to do with inactivity and lack of protein in his diet. spending too much time in bed and not exercising will also promote the loss of muscle.He sounds depressed, & it's easier to sleep that to deal with profound sorrow.
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docwells2000, you are right on the money! I agree with you 100%!
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We have grown to expect to become frail by the time we are 75. My family has remained active into their late 80s and even up to 100. Don't assume that advanced age must be equated with frailty or ill health. Take your dad in for a complete physical and testing. He should be tested for thyroid & D3 as well as for B12 deficiency. The other problem could be diabetes. A glucose tolerance test will reveal if there's a problem with low or high blood sugar or possibly diabetes or hypoglycemia. Physical therapy could help his posture and his endurance and balance. My mother is having PT at 104 to help her regain her strength after multiple UTIs. Your dad could also be anemic.
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A man of 75 should be active.
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Stumbled across this site and I've never been so grateful in all my life.

My dad is much like yours. Sleeping ALL day, trying to get my dad outside for a walk, fresh air was not an option, he simply wanted to sleep...a computer, Koodoos!

I hate drugs. I feel that they only mask symptoms, certain meds cause even more problems BUT seeing my dad sleeping all day, not living, just existing made me feel horrible for him. Understanding that age, the inevitable declines that are a part of aging and losses (wife, siblings, house etc..) all play a role in the physical and mental decline of our aging parents but that doesn't mean we should sit by and watch with idle hands.
I decided to have a chat with my dad (this goes back many years) and I came right out and asked him about taking an antidepressant. I don't exactly recall what I said, how I said it but I did. It was daring, as I was asking a man who never took or needed a medication in his life, ate organically, I was going out on a limb and nervous cause I'd exhausted any other measures to get my dad out of bed.
Surprisingly, my dad agreed.
The mild dose of an anti-depressant really helped.
The anti-depressant helped my dad get out of bed, get outside, be willing to engage with others, live, laugh and I saw a newish man. Albeit, he still slept but he answered the phone, he went to his meals, he enjoyed our time together rather than finding reasons sleep.
At that time dad was living in a retirement home, unaided, could do as he wanted, meals were prepared or he could make his own.
I know everyone is different, situations are different, I'm just throwing this out there because no one else has and wayyyy back then, my dad became healthier due to the minor change.
I'm not a medication pusher, thought this might help.
(Thank you for letting me share the happy' s in my dad's life, lately they're few and far between).
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If he's amenable to a physical work up, you should try to get him in, for yout peave of mind and maybe his fatigue is as simply based as low o-sats. My own husband, aged 63, also has extreme muscle loss due to inactivity. He's severely depressed and altho he can work a 40 hr week, if he is not actively working, he's in bed and usually asleep. No amt of dr's intervention or family begging & pleading will get my husband to get out of bed on a non-work day. I have given up--at age 58 I am essentially a widow. Also, when people's bodies start to shut down, they want to sleep. Daddy did, before he died. Mother fussed at him to get up and move and he simply couldn't--his brain has ceased to function in a way that allowed him much movement. He was only 73. Parkinson's. Hard on Mom to see him go downhill so fast, but dying is a part of living. Of course you want to rule out any simple causation for this, but one thing I have learned, you can't make people get up and "be" or "do" what YOU want them to. I wish you luck.
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It could be a side effect of his meds his heart rate may be to low!
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IMO, everyone, as long as they can move, benefits from exercise. Find a PT or certified exercise therapist who could develop a simple exercise routine. Exercise is good for one's brain and mood. See if any on the staff can help. Very light weights, ball toss, Get him moving-even a little bit.
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Also hypoglycemics with reactive hypoglycemia tend to get tired after eating.

Don't know if it would help your dad but my wife is on low dose of REMERON for depression, appetite stimulant. and insomnia.
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Just my 2 cents.
Knowledge helps with making decisions.
Get a blood pressure monitor.
Get a glucose blood tester (finger poke device).
Thermometer.
Also compute his daily caloric intake by using a site such as CalorieCount.
Also check mouth, tongue etc.
Check vitals as best you can and see if anything looks off.
Test a few times a day to see if any on those show abnormal then at least you can make decisions on telling doctor. same with calories.
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My dad is like this man and he has been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease.
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Has your father seen a doctor about this problem? That's your first step, not this website.
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I'm sorry, but sometimes we, including myself, over think things. My dad is 76, with Alzheimer's, and he is getting older. He too is losing muscle mass but maintaining a steady weight. What you've described doesn't sound abnormal for an elderly man of 82. Our bodies get tired. As we age they get tired quickly. Let him enjoy his naps, if he enjoys them. At 82 he's earned a nap whenever he needs one.
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Oops, it's been 19 months. It's all a blur!
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My dad sleeps 20+ hours a day and has lived in the recliner for the 17 months since mom died. He gets weaker and weaker. Since your dad still seems to "get it," take him to the doctor for evaluation. My father says he's fine and won't go. I did get a chuckle out of him today. The Father's Day card I got said that you can pick a present: 1. A trip. 2. One million dollars. or 3. (open card) This card! Boy, you were easy to buy for!
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I could write a book about this. Short version, get him oxygen! Even if he only uses it at night, It makes huge difference. Get your doctor on board.
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This is my dad as well. I'll definitely take him to his PCP, I've been getting worried. I think it's a form of depression as well. Thanks for all the suggestions.
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