Follow
Share

Whether I leave the house for groceries or go outside to mow, she does this!! I have to take the comforter to the laundromat each time because it is too large for my washer!! She doesn’t remember doing any of this. Please help before I lose my sanity.

Sounds as if she should not be left alone. I would arrange so I could do all errands and chores on one day and get an agency caregiver. Then a second day each week so you can just do for you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to gladimhere
Report

She seems to be at the point that she needs constant supervision, especially if you cannot take her with you on errands. As for the comforter, a simple solution is to get her new bedding that fits in the washer. I would not be too pleased knowing that her bedding was washed prior to my using the same washer at a laundromat
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to MACinCT
Report

Why? Because she has dementia, I assume. Susan explains this very well. Susan also has a good suggestion -- arrange additional help, so Mom won't be left on her own.

This is sad, but most dementia cases reach a point where they need monitoring 24/7.

Some caregivers arrange for grocery delivery and for the neighbor kid to mow the lawn, and that does minimize the amount of help needed. But I really think it is better for you to get out of the house once in a while when someone else is watching your mother.

Have you considered an Adult Day Health Program? That is another way to have Mom supervised and you to have some time to yourself.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to jeannegibbs
Report

Buckiiiz - I don't see any info about your Mom's condition, but you mention that she doesn't remember doing things. This is a hallmark of dementia. The dementia brain is "broken" and she can't be held responsible for her actions - it's hard for you to deal with, but she honestly doesn't realize what she's doing, nor can she stop it. Without someone there to guide her every move during the process of changing her diaper or using the bathroom, she loses track of what the next step is - so she gets the diaper off (because apparently her mind still remembers that part of what needs to be done) - but forgets the rest and simply sits down, because in that moment, she doesn't know what else to do. Her mind doesn't recognize the fact that she's soiled the bedspread or that she's sitting in the mess. I know it seems impossible, but that's pretty much what's happening.

I'm not saying you're getting upset with her about it, but your post definitely indicates it's a stressful situation. It might be time to bring in some outside help or help from family, if it's available, so that you can run errands, mow the law, etc without worrying about what Mom's doing. If she's reached this point, she really shouldn't be left alone.

I hope you can find someone to help - perhaps check with the local agency on aging and see if they have recommendations for home care aides or a possible respite program. Best wishes to you and your mom.
Helpful Answer (5)
Reply to AnonymousMember
Report