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My mother is verbally abusive even though I do everything I can to help her out. I’m the only one in our family who takes care of her. It’s never enough. Why do I put up with her? Why is she like this? I get so sick of this.

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I'm in the same exact situation as you. My mother is verbally abusive, instigates fights, devalues me to no end, and has absolutely no respect whatsoever for me on any level. I am the only one who does anything for her and knows that she can treat me any way she wants because I'm trapped in this situation.
Give it right back to her and then some. This is what I started doing, and let me tell you the situation around here has improved greatly. Give it a try. If it's possible, put her in the appropriate care facility to meet her needs and be done with it.
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You have also asked a similar question today, asking "Why do I put up with her?"
I answered your other question, and to this one I will say she is like this, because you allow her to. If you were to walk away when she gets abusive or tell her that you won't tolerate it anymore, and won't do for her if she continues, perhaps things would change.
In your profile you say that your mother has Alzheimer's/dementia, but I am guessing she has been this way all her life, and as long as you continue to put up with it, it will never change.
Like I said in your other post, perhaps it's time to be looking into placing your mother in a memory care facility, so you can get on with living your life and she can take out her abuse on someone else.
You deserve better, and until you realize that, things will remain the same.
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That's a good question. Why do you put up with her? Do you feel you "owe" her something or are responsible for her in some way? Well guess what? Your mother is not your responsibility. Perhaps it's time to be looking into placing her in memory care, so you can get your life back, and she can take out her abuse on someone else, as there has to come a time when you say enough is enough.
My hope is that you'll have the strength and the courage to do just that.
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Maybe it is time to look for Memory Care for mom.
Not everyone can be a caregiver. Some are better at being a Care Manager or Advocate for a loved one.
Caregiving can be a challenge and it is mentally, emotionally, physically exhausting. Add in the disposition of the person you care for. Some, like my Husband are easy to care for, others are violent, others just plain nasty.
As a Caregiver the number one rule is CARE FOR YOURSELF and if you can't do that you are no good to the person you are trying to care for.
It may be "easy" at first but unlike some other diseases dementia gets worse. There is no cure, there is no remission, there is no break. And you know it will only get worse. Unlike a child that grows up and needs less care this is a person that needs more care, you are living the final act in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.
The only person that can answer your question.."Why do I put up with her?" is you. It is your choice to keep caring for her or place her where she will get 24/7 care in a safe place. This frees you to manage her care and be an advocate for her without the direct caregiving.
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So sorry to hear this, it must be extremely difficult. Was your mother verbally abusive before her illness? If she has dementia, the behavior may be intensified by this.

There is no easy solution, but check with her care providers to see if depression, anxiety or other mood disorder can be ruled out/treated. It may be hard, but you have to preserve yourself. If other measures don't help, place her if you are able. My heart goes out to you.
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