Why do I not have home nursing assistance for my Mom and she's taking too many laxatives? She has me buying them so I'm her enabler. If I sound like I'm refusing she gets condescending. Well she is and at 89 years old she wants to be tough and dominate like a b****. Sorry but that's how I feel. Well I'm the son of a sociopath so its between the hammer and the anvil. I don't plan on going down without a fight. I'm a nice guy but I'm not a pushover. My birthday was July 15th and I turned 54. I just thought what an accomplishment in a crazy world. You wonder if no one cares if your down and out. I said I'm down but I'm not out.

You wrote this last month: "I have a half Sister that lives in Lotus, Ca and works in Sacramento. I'm waiting for her to move back here so she can handle and take over being a Caregiver for our Mom who is a bear."

Do you really think this will happen?
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Reply to CTTN55

Why are you allowing a ''sociopath'' to live with you?
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Reply to ZippyZee

Sorry your mom is a sociopath. I'd want to run away, Far, far away.

Why do you think there should be a home nursing assistant? You can hire one, with mom's money?

It's a good combo to be a nice guy but not a pushover.

Assuming if she's taking too many laxatives, she's having bathroom troubles. So what if she gets condescending? Sounds like your burnt out and annoyed with her antics anyhow. So learn how to tune her out and set boundaries and tell her what's what instead of the other way around.

Good luck.
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Reply to againx100

Maybe time to place her. You are 54 and should be enjoying this time of your life. If Mom has been this way all your life, time for a break.

I hope you have POA. If so, find her a nice AL if she can afford it. If not, a nice LTC facility with Medicaid paying for her care. Then all you need do is visit when and if u want.
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Reply to JoAnn29

Does she need a laxative?
If she does not need one then replace a laxative with another "pill" it could be a TicTac, a Skittle, or say you have switched to one like a piece of chocolate.
Use moms assets to hire a caregiver that will come in a few days a week.
You could begin thinking about Memory Care if you do not feel that you can continue caring for her at home. Caring for her will get m ore difficult as she declines, it will not get easier.
If she qualifies for Hospice you would have a Nurse that would see her 1 time a week and the nurse would order necessary medications. A CNA would come in a few times a week and bathe, dress and change sheets as well as order supplies that you need. Hospice is covered by Medicare. With Hospice you could also request a Volunteer that could come and sit with mom or do a few things around the house if needed.
If mom was in the service she may qualify for help through the VA.
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Reply to Grandma1954

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