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I am 52 yrs old and my children have finally found themselves. So now was the time for my husband and I to enjoy ourselves! Weekends away, traveling, restaurants!!! Then the hurricane came and when I finally got to Mom, I brought her back to my home until her utilities came back. But then, I realized that she needed more care than what she had and I decided to keep her with me. My life has totally changed! I have a 24 hr hha for her and everything revolves around Mom and what she wants to eat and do. She and the HHA live in my home and sometimes I feel I just visit. My husband and I do everything for Mom and I have her POA and I am her health care proxy. Mom has told me that she does not want anything shared with my sisters, and I respect that. Her business is her business and I don't share whatever with them. So now I got a card from a caseworker from where she lives asking me to call her in regards to Mom. Then a caseworker visited my home--but I was not home and the HHA did not answer the door. Why would anyone want to report someone who has changed their whole life for their parent and given up so much, Oh--did I add that Mom has lots and lots of money which is hers until the day she dies and if she wants to eat lobster and caviar and go on a safari--that is what we will do! I AM SO ANGRY and of course, hurt. What do I do?

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So APS came to the house. Although she was very nice, you could tell she was uncomfortable--and that was fine. She wanted to know personal financial issues that my mother did not want to talk aobut and APS was fine about it. It appears that "someone" was questioning who was taking care of her finances and all the withdrawals that are needed to pay her bills that she has instructed me as the POA to do. Anyone can report you--the neighbor, the accountant, the bank, the supermarket checkout girl--and they will without a word to you!! So, even if you are giving your last drop of blood for your family member, someone can say you are abusing them and call APS!!
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it is standard procedure when an elder is released from a hospital for aps to visit the home to see firsthand what the situation is. otherwise a jealous sibling may have contacted them.,.
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Did you call back the social worker and ask her to come back out, this time when you're home? Until you talk face to face with this person, how will you get a feel as to who is stabbing you in the back? If it's one of your siblings, I would think you'd get a sense of that from the caseworker, even though this person can't tell you outright. You said your mother doesn't want your sisters to know 'her business', so it that about money AND health or what exactly. My point I guess is, if your sisters are out of the loop about moms health, then I would think that would reflect in exactly WHAT the caseworker wanted to talk to you about, if it were just vague concerns for example. If I were you, I'd put my hurt feelings on hold (for now) and do some snooping into who has the problem with you. But gotta tell ya, as soon as you mentioned money, I'd look no further than your own family unfortunately. Just like God warned us in the Bible: " For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows." I Timothy 6:10
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Let the caseworker in and Mom talk to her. They have to investigate reports but if everything is fine, there will be no problems.

Perhaps this stems from keeping your sisters in the dark. Maybe this is their way of trying to ensure that Mom is safe and well cared for. Or maybe it was someone else who misinterpreted something they saw or thought they saw.

In any case, if all is well you have nothing to worry about.
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