My mom lives in a memory care unit. Tonight my sister reported she did not get her bath. She was told the water was turned off. She did not get the dental treatment prescribed by her dentist. Nor did she get cream administered to her bottom for a diarrhea issues.
My mom, with the beginnings of dementia once told me, " you know, I have to manage my own meds in here". The nurse was sitting there and had just given my mom her afternoon medications. When I asked mom what she meant by that, she pointed to the water pitcher with a "significant" look.
From that moment on, I verified what had actually happened before I got upset with staff.
Be kind to the staff. Rudeness rarely stimulates the behavior you want.
A thank you, a smile, a box of donuts... goes a long way with kindness.
The other two issues are more concerning. Having been through this with my mom in a NH for 4 years, my advice is this: ask for a care meeting! Focus on these two issues--why mom is not getting prescribed treatments.
It may be that mom refuses. It may be that mom doesnt remember getting the treatment. It maybe that although the dentist prescribed the treatment, the med was not ordered. It could be that although it was prescribed in his notes, it never made it into the DON's chart.
We found that there multiple ways that mom's treatment could get screwed up. Fixing it remotely never worked. Having a meeting where all the players were in the same room worked every time and helped us understand better how the system worked.
It IS exhausting! Good luck, and let us know how this turns out. We learn from each other.
If your mom is refusing to take a bath, or have her dental treatment, the staff can not force any treatment on her. That being said they do need to encourage her to take a bath, have her dental work and let them apply the cream. Staff should offer the treatments more than once, have different staff approach her and do everything in their power to get her to allow them to do these things.
The number one refused treatment in nursing homes is baths. Residents refuse to take a bath more than they refuse medication, therapy, diets, doctors orders or anything else. When a resident is refusing to take a bath the staff need to try and figure out why the resident is refusing. Some of the reasons I have seen residents refuse to bathe are the time of day, water temperature, water pressure, personality conflict with staff, a dignity issue, cultural issues. When a resident has dementia they may not understand what the staff are asking them to do, they don't process information like we do.
I would recommend you talk to the Director of Nursing and request a Care Plan to discuss these issues.
Always take a gentle approach at first, that's my suggestion. Reporting her care home to the state, the ombudsman, the corporate headquarters, etc, is just a bit of overkill unless there is true negligence or abuse involved, in my opinion. The DON or the ED is usually more than happy to address your concerns and get things handled for you in a professional fashion. If not, THEN you have the option to take things further.
Best of luck!
I saw an aide using a towel to clean poo and the same towel to wipe the body and face ! is there any infection control?any hygienical system ? health is wealth. sad status...also the nursing homes employ less staff and they are over worked.
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