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im sorry, im fried from 55 yrs of life. the vodka drinkin mother carer and jeanne gibbs. youre both special and we miss you. the male carer for his simplistic but thorough methods, jeanne for her personal and professional carer techniques. to both, masters degrees are earned in the field. eff a bunch of higher education / student debt..your the real deal.

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Hey seriously, everyone...just read an anonymous quote, "Your brain stops working when you are afraid you are going to lose someone you love." Lord knows it's true, and Cap'n, you won a lot of hearts on here despite everything, we realize things are very rough and IMHO you DON'T suck. Jeanne has a lot of messages, including mine, asking her to come back, I hope she is OK and able to forgive the harsher people that sometimes post on here. I remember how hurt and how I felt like a dishrag after "dueling" with one of them...who BTW, seems to have learned a lot and matured terrifically since then. Hugs, love. and prayers for all of us, whether you are in a good spot or a bad spot at the moment...
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It's a shame what happened to Jeanne, I hope she comes back. Several people stood up for Jeanne on that thread...Mother/daughter arrangement dividing the family. She decided to take a break.
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With regards to JeanneGibbs, a lot of newcomers just did not appreciate her point of view. In my opinion, they came on here expecting to be coddled. Instead, she gave them the bare facts. Sometimes tactfully and sometimes straight to the point. I read the final straw when Jeanne decided to take a break from here. And on that thread, she said Nothing to deserve what was said to her. Darn, if I had a son like hers and did all those house chores that men usually do, I would have welcomed him with open arms, too! Yeah, I miss Jeanne, too.

And the moral of the story...when posters criticize another poster for no good reason, and we all keep quiet, eventually that criticized poster will get tired of the constant negatives. But if we gently reprimand or correct the criticizer or comment opposite of them, it helps others see that it's not acceptable behavior if no offense was given. Too tired..hope I make sense.

Captain - who is whatzisface?
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Cap'n, we could tell you had a bit too much of something! Sorry it is going worse for Mom, whatever else she did or did not do right, she is still your mom and its sad.

Here's one to go with your differential jokes...you know why mathematicians shouldn't touch alcohol? Because it's not safe to drink and derive!
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There comes a time in a person's life, where they journey on the road never traveled and leave behind the heavy burdens of their past life and never look back. Sometimes survival over takes a person's impossible responsibilities. Miss them, but be happy for them for they are set free.
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I miss Jeanne. She was such a wonderful participant on these threads --- good advice, tactful but firm, good at putting things in perspective when emotion or ego took over a thread. Maybe in her absence more folks will step up and do the same thing. Jeanne---how are we doing?
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on their knees the war pigs crawling----
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my mom is so pissed tonight that im listening to ronnie dio insteads of her tales of miscalculating the church books by 10 cents that she cant stand it. lyin hor ripped the church outta tens of thousands but like most religious people, finds a way to justify it. meh, cause smokin and drinkin is all that you do-ooo, na-na-na-na-na.. told her to enjoy some sabbath with me or stfu. i aint terribly diplomatic..
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Captain you are in rare form.

The laughter part is spot on- my MIL's eyes would light up with silliness or fun. Even when she couldn't follow along she laughed along. And she liked to be mean and make comments to the nurses and aides that needed to lose weight. They thought she was funny, so she did it some more.

She wanted her hair dyed bright red about a month after FIL died last year. She was interested in a man at the nursing home- she wasn't wasting any time. She preened and flirted the moment she emerged from the beauty parlor. I told my husband " your mother is officially done with mourning".

She loved to dress up and we kept her in new clothing. She had long nails and they were kept polished with bright colors. (I couldn't bring myself to look at her hands after she died. They were her pride. Even on her anxious days when she want to lay in her bed with the covers pulled up- she would peek at her hands and smile at her lovely nails.) Her last weeks she was thrilled with her weight loss and enjoyed showing off her skinny arms and legs. Her hospice aide did her hair each visit, I did too- we would play beauty shop and gossip. She might have been the most glamorous person in hospice ever.

She was never a bright lady, but she died with dignity and done nails.

L
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my god, i suck !!
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my mother is dropping weight and we both realize that this means her life is closing. we carers can only try to make those last days / weeks meaningfull. we cant create euphoria or contentment. dont beat yourselves up people. make em laugh when you can. laughter is the high point of our lives. i grabbed my 89 yr old aunts ass the other day and told her she had one hot ass for an old girl. ive never seen her laugh harder. she followed us to the car. i think she liked being felt up. lol. edna is my trike riding buddy.
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