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My father passed several years ago my mother recently had a stroke and I have just become aware that she could be eligible for widow pension. She never received a pension. She is need of assisted living as you can expect ss is just not going to cut it. Where should I start?

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Was your father receiving a pension when he died? If so, that's where you start. If not, start with his employers. If he worked for a company that had a pension plan, a spousal death benefit is required once the employee works long enough to be vested.

I don't know about pensions from other sources.
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Do you mean a pension from your father's employer? Or from the VA?
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