Your choices are limited and that is the reality of aging in America. If she needs skilled nursing care then she needs to be in a NH if it is not feasible for a combination of family and paid caregivers to provide what she needs; and then once her $ is down to whatever Medicaid has set for limits for your state then she applies for Medicaid to pay for the NH.
She might be able to qualify for hospice which doesnt pay for the NH room & board but will provide for more hands-on help for her when in the NH. It can also do the same for at-home care but family or paid help will need to be there for the majority of time that no hospice aid or RN is present.
I would suggest that you find a NH that will take her now as private pay and then will accept her as Medicaid Pending for later on. You will find that her options are wider if she is able to private pay for a period of time before applying for Medicaid.
If mom has savings, please try to get things done for her now with her funds that are things that Medicaid will never pay for. If she needs dental work, that is a great use of $ as it is almost always NOT covered by either Medicare or Medicaid. If she does not have a fully prepaid funeral & burial, spend her $ to get those done too. If she needs new eyeglasses or hearing aids, get those as well. Remember that once they go onto Medicaid & are in a NH, they are required to do a co-ay for SOC (share of cost) of all their monthly income (like Ss and retirement) as their co-pay to the NH. Mom will essential not have any funds anymore expect for a smallish pernaonsl needs allowance. The PNA ranges from $ 35 - 105 a mon & dpeendeds on yru state as to amount….really its enough for beauty salon and some clothing replacement at best.
It sounds like she really needs skilled care in a nursing home. I think your only option is to apply for Medicaid. Igloo has given some good advice regarding how to spend her money down to the level it needs to be at to qualify.
Is your mom currently at home or in the hospital? If she's hospitalized, please take advantage of the discharge planning professionals who can assist you in getting her into a good rehab/NH situation which may be paid for by Medicare for a brief period. She can then become a private pay patient until she qualifies for Medicaid.
If she's currently at home, start researching all the NHs in your area and get her on waiting lists. Talk to the business office at each and ask them if they accept Medicaid after a period of private pay. Those are the facilities that you want to check out and get her on lists for. good luck!
Some people like this manage to live with their families. When I see it I am amazed at the generosity and willingness in it. But it happens all the time. It is legal for a family member to be paid for this if an agreement is drawn up with specifications about services and pay, and the elder or their representative must be able to sign it, and the amounts need to match market value. Exchange of money like this would require that an attorney should help you draft the contract. She could live at a daughter's home for $3000 per month, for example, and it could be perfectly legal for now if done with full transparency and short visit with lawyer. That short lawyer visit and paperwork could easily cost you $2000.
If possible, as kathy1951 said, she could live at home with aides and visiting nurses coming in. Ask her doctor or the social worker at the hospital to create a care plan for her and see how that looks. They should have a really good idea of what's feasible.
This may be slightly off topic, but, my mother is in a nursing home. The private pay rate is $405 a day, or about $12,000 a month (in NY). As Igloo said, if you are on Medicaid, the nursing home will take everything else you have worked and saved so hard for. When I see residents in dirty clothes, aides openly complaining about the job, a sofa in the common area that looks like it's from year 1, I feel furious at the nerve they have to charge so much. The LPN on duty is not even allowed to clean a cut and put on a band-aid (something about their not being allowed to administer medical care). It's such a bad system and God forbid you "complain" and get in their crosshairs, they can make your life hell. It is so very sad out options are so very limited.
If she can be up in a wheelchair, it may be possible to find an adult care home for her to live in that is Medicaid certified. This would be more like a family house, with only 10 or less residents living there and, perhaps, more personalized care....like family would provide..... But she would need to NOT be bedridden or have nursing care needs like colostomy care or IV meds etc. In Arizona, we have a lot of them that are Medicaid certified in our bigger cities.
She might be able to qualify for hospice which doesnt pay for the NH room & board but will provide for more hands-on help for her when in the NH. It can also do the same for at-home care but family or paid help will need to be there for the majority of time that no hospice aid or RN is present.
I would suggest that you find a NH that will take her now as private pay and then will accept her as Medicaid Pending for later on. You will find that her options are wider if she is able to private pay for a period of time before applying for Medicaid.
If mom has savings, please try to get things done for her now with her funds that are things that Medicaid will never pay for. If she needs dental work, that is a great use of $ as it is almost always NOT covered by either Medicare or Medicaid. If she does not have a fully prepaid funeral & burial, spend her $ to get those done too. If she needs new eyeglasses or hearing aids, get those as well. Remember that once they go onto Medicaid & are in a NH, they are required to do a co-ay for SOC (share of cost) of all their monthly income (like Ss and retirement) as their co-pay to the NH. Mom will essential not have any funds anymore expect for a smallish pernaonsl needs allowance. The PNA ranges from $ 35 - 105 a mon & dpeendeds on yru state as to amount….really its enough for beauty salon and some clothing replacement at best.
If she's currently at home, start researching all the NHs in your area and get her on waiting lists. Talk to the business office at each and ask them if they accept Medicaid after a period of private pay. Those are the facilities that you want to check out and get her on lists for. good luck!
She could live at a daughter's home for $3000 per month, for example, and it could be perfectly legal for now if done with full transparency and short visit with lawyer. That short lawyer visit and paperwork could easily cost you $2000.
This may be slightly off topic, but, my mother is in a nursing home. The private pay rate is $405 a day, or about $12,000 a month (in NY). As Igloo said, if you are on Medicaid, the nursing home will take everything else you have worked and saved so hard for. When I see residents in dirty clothes, aides openly complaining about the job, a sofa in the common area that looks like it's from year 1, I feel furious at the nerve they have to charge so much. The LPN on duty is not even allowed to clean a cut and put on a band-aid (something about their not being allowed to administer medical care). It's such a bad system and God forbid you "complain" and get in their crosshairs, they can make your life hell. It is so very sad out options are so very limited.