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I've asked for help with previous question in regard to my mother thinking she is constipated but actually isnt and answers have been of great help. But what now is occuring is when the topic of constipation comes up and she has forgotten she had the bowl movement and gets argumentative. But what happens with her is at a point she "realizes" she's forgotten and then a "panic attack" sets in and out of fear realizing what's happening that she can't remember, she gets the panic attack. Could that be at all possible?

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Gosh I don't disagree! And another thing to be said for a psychiatric assessment and possible treatment is that if you can get in ahead of any depression that might also be in the pipeline, you could save your mother the heart-rending, silent despair that goes with that.
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To expand upon what I suggested about treating mom's anxiety and agitation:

In dementia, one's brain is broken. Often folks with dementia are aware that this is happening and that something is amiss with their thinking skills. This sometimes happened to mom in more lucid moments; she would then return to her illogical panic about some small issue that she couldn't figure out how to solve.

I guess my point is that NO AMOUNT of reassurance, explaining or comforting that "we were there for her" helped. Having round the clock aides didn't help. Moving her into a place where there was round the clock staff didn't help AS MUCH as medication did.

Once mom saw a geripsych who PROPERLY medicated her anxiety (not "reactive" dosing--ooh, I'm anxious I should take a pill", but regular, small doses to "get ahead" of the anxiety") is what helped. Mom became calmer, not dopey, not more rational, just better able to "hear" us when she called with a problem and we told her how to solve it. "Call the staff, mom". "Ring for the aide, Mom". "Write it down on a list and I'll do it when I see you on Sunday", as opposed to a full scale panic when she saw an ant, needed something adjusted in her bathroom or realized she needed her pants hemmed.

24/7 reassurance might be lovely, but since we all had to sleep, work and tend our marriages and kids, it simply wasn't possible. And since much of mom's panic came in the middle of the night, starting her on meds was an absolute must.

See this agitation and anxiety as a symptom and get it treated.
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I think if I couldn't even recollect my own bowel movements that day I'd panic a bit, too.

Perhaps because it is an insoluble problem, I think we don't much discuss the fear people might feel when they realise (and they are right) that they are slowly losing their minds. I spent an hour on a hospital ward on Tuesday night visiting an elderly friend. The lady in the next bed sobbed quietly throughout. If she'd been saying "I want to go home" that would have been comparatively easy - albeit a bit tedious - to reassure her about. But she was saying "I don't know where I live, and I don't know where I'm to go." She was terrified by the not-knowing itself. At least twice, a nurse on this extremely busy ward did take the time to try to reassure her; but what this lady really needed was someone to hold her hand and be with her.

So, WillyB, it wouldn't surprise me one bit if your mother feels very anxious when it dawns on her that her memory of her own routine is faulty. But she is lucky, because you are there, and you can say to her something like "that's what I'm here for, so that you've got back-up. Everything will be okay."

You may have to do this rather a lot.

Echoing BB's question, have you consulted anyone about these symptoms?
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I seem to recall that there was a suggestion to see a geripsych due to your mom's agitation? Has that happened?
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My mother has the same constipation problem and forgetfulness. She doesn't remember if she has bowel movement already and complains that she hasn't gone for days when in fact she has just gone earlier in the day.

i ask her: "Do you have stomach ache?" No. "Does your stomach feel uncomfortable?" No. "Then don't worry, Your body knows when to go." If she says yes to being uncomfortable, then I give her some laxative pills to take.
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