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My mother died two years ago. I am living with/taking care of a psychologically abusive father. He has the financial means to have caregivers here. My older brother recently came down for a visit.. My father spent the entire time trashing me behind my back (I could easily overhear the nonsense) It is starting to feel like the only reasons I am here are to (1) keep him from throwing away thousands of dollars (live rent free). He has always been a chronic complainer who blows off steam over nothing but this situation is looking useless and idiotic. Is it time for me to just throw in the towel and bail?

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Well, a I originally wrote about abusive mothers. There are

"50 ways to leave your abusive father".

It is sad to see you in so much pain
I wish I could quickly make life happy again

The path to freedom is clear by approaching it logically
I want to help you make it better and get yourself free

There must be 50 ways to leave an abusive father!

Just use the key,
Its name is boundary
use it to get yourself free!

Just make a new plan, Stan
Send her to assisted livin’, Kevin


There must be 50 ways to leave an abusive father!
---------------------------------------------

I have yet to write more verses but you get the idea.

Save yourself!
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I would like to go back to work. The only thing that keeps me is going is having a daughter and grandchildren living nearby. Caregivers come 5 hours a day M thru F but that hasn't "solved" the problem. Frankly, taking care of my Mom was a piece of cake compared to the relentless b*tching from my Dad. She was so grateful. I think it is tougher to be with someone who is in relatively good shape but wants to join his wife (impossible to please). He needs to be kept occupied 24/7 but has no interest in doing anything. It is too hot out to take him for walks. Blah blah blah. I need to bolt.
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Dreyfuss, I believe you are totally burnt out after reading some of your past postings going back two years. No one can keep up that pace. You need to be in a happier environment, maybe go back to work full-time, earn a paycheck, be around other people.
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Thx for responses. My Dad is still POA. I have given my older brother a heads up that my days here are numbered. I don't see the need to ramble on here. I need to leave. I can live within a couple of miles and check in from time to time. Our "inheritance" will likely evaporate. Frankly, I don't give a d*mn anymore. Thx again.
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The time for you to move our is yesterday!
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Just keep in mind that narcissistic men turn into really bad tyrants when dementia comes calling later on. (Trash talking the caregiving child, even during church is a favorite fun activity.)

Who is POA? Would your brother step into that role if you left? Do you have spouse and children with you there?

Only you can decide what to do here, but sounds like you are getting burned out from the strain of putting up with this nonsense.

My advice is to put things in order, make different arrangements and get out before he sucks the life out of your soul.
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