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My brother and sis in law have been caring for my dad, but he's begun fighting their every efforts. He doesn't have dementia but is becoming more forgetful. He has to be on oxygen or he get's confused. He's fallen twice in the last month, and it's hard to get him up. He's overweight and refuses to use his walker.


He can do much for himself, but the Oxygen and fighting with my brother and sis in law (something new) and falling makes me wonder if he wouldn't be turned down now for an independant living situation. If we had to place him somewhere I'm afraid it would have to be a nursing home and that would kill him.


Also, once in a nursing home, how hard is it to get him out to transfer him to another if he's physically able to travel? If he goes into a nursing home in Texas and is totally miserable, I might want to transfer him from that home to a home near me that I know does a good job but is 8 hours away from Texas.

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Thanks Zythr.. It's looking more like AL isn't going to work. Dad's going downhill fast... we're holding our collective breaths...
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Dustien

Be forewarned, anything your dad may need, such as medicine, PT,is extra and will be on he or your family to pay.
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Pam, I meant assisted living, not independent living...my bad. I think he might be able to not be combative with others like he is with my sis in law and brother these days, but I'm not sure. He wasn't this way just a few months ago...

Thanks... I'll start calling to see if there are any assisted living facilities in Mt. Pleasant Texas. Small town so choices will most likey be slim, but hopefully we'll find something good.

And tips in talking with them from others who've dealt with assisted living before would be appreciated! Thanks!
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A lot depends on the Assisted Living and what they offer in the way of help. I know for my Dad, he started needing help with getting out of bed, help with taking a shower, help with using the toilet, and some help with getting dressed. Dad had sundowning.

He was able to get around using a rolling walker but he was a fall risk. He knew what time the meals were and would get himself there.. if he didn't show up on time, an Aide would go to his room, usually Dad would be napping.

Then in the evening an Aide would help Dad get ready for bed. The facility did all the pill management for everyone in the building. Dad got his required pills daily. Every hour an Aide would check on him. There was also physical therapy.
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You can ask those questions in your search for a NH/AL. Make sure to get everything in writing and get a copy of all agreements, admissions for yourself.
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At assisted living, the residents can still get dressed and bathe independently. They can walk to a dining room, find their table and feed themselves. They cooperate when handed their medications. They enjoy socializing and bus trips. Your Dad is well past Independent Living, but will qualify for Assisted Living only without being combative.
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