I am new to this blog my best friend gave me this website to go to probably because she got tired of me complaining to her (lol). I picked this thread because of the heading it so fits my mother. Let me give you a little background my father had a massive stroke in 2011...my parents were married for 47 years and my mother had nothing outside of my father....so daily depression led into a stroke then dementia. My sister doesn't work so she was our only option to take care of mother since the rest of us cannot afford to work. I am the youngest and have been dealing with the insurance companies...who have advised me that there is no help from her policy since she has no option for long term care(blue cross and medicare)...advised us we can pay $20 an hour to have a caregiver in the home.....but who can afford that...she hasn't showered in over 5 months...yes you heard me right...everytime we try she gets physical and verbal...she is being abusive to my sister all day every day...embarrasses her in public...by yelling at her constantly.....throws stuff at her..me and my brother take turns watching her on weekends and she is nasty to us too..but not to the extent she is with my sister.....and its getting worse and my sister has told us we better think of what to do with mother because she cannot take it anymore (and I can understand)...nursing home is the only option..because although she has paid into her policy for well over 50 years...they say sorry can't help....and that's whats so frustrating...because we don't want our mother to go in there...we just know it is going to send her to an early death and her depression will get worse because she is a serious introvert....she doesn't really like socializing with people....my dad was her only friend..he couldn't even walk next door to my brother's house without her getting upset and calling him to come back home after like maybe an hour over there....As siblings we have been so sweet to each other our whole life...never really got into any arguments...but I am afraid that is going to change if we don't do something soon...but the frustration comes in as WHAT DO WE DO?