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No one seems to care but me. My 93 year old Mom has been relatively healthy but this past year she seems to decline by the day. Her hands tremor at times, she is weak, afraid to walk and feels unbalanced, is bored, anxious, agitated, fluctuates in appetite, has gained weight in the stomach, has a puffy face, and wants to sleep a lot. Her doctor seems to do nothing and she won't listen to anything I suggest. We have a fantastic MD and ND right near us and she refuses to be open to help. Any ideas?

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judda - some of those symptoms could be low thyroid - puffy, swollen abdomen, sleep a lot, weak, and personality and appetite changes. Even if her test results, which likely would be TSH, are borderline, meds would probably help. It is a fairly common condition in older women, and can be "sub-clinical" which still needs treatment. It eventually affects the heart. The naturopathic meds are usually not enough. There is enough iodine in our diets in developed countries. Mother developed it about 20 years ago and her doctor didn't catch it. I knew the symptoms as I have it, and mentioned it to her when she was visiting here. She talked to her doctor and was tested and put on meds. She was tired weak, pale, etc. - not like her at all. It is fairly common and can be attributed to "old age". My grandmother (mother's mother) died from heart failure which I believe was due to undiagnosed low thyroid. She had the symptoms. Pretty well all the women in her family live to their 90s. My grandmother died in her 70s.
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Parkinson's was my first thought, but 93 is old to be starting to show symptoms. Still, it's not impossible. You didn't mention if she's complaining of pain, specifically pain on urination, or if she's jaundiced. Not kidneys? Not liver? Is she on any medications? You mentioning that she has a puffy face made me think of corticosteroids, which could cause her adrenal glands to go into overdrive, producing the anxiety you mentioned.
Is she eating a balanced diet? Would she consider having a colonoscopy, or would that be too hard on her at her age? Will she let the doctor draw blood, so he/she can run some tests? The symptoms you mentioned could be caused by lots of things, but the doctor telling you that she's just getting old is laziness on his/her part. The issue is, how willing is your mother to find out what's wrong? If she's resistant to having some tests done, there's not much you can do.
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I think there comes a point with seniors at our moms' age where there's not much to be done if the diagnosis is Parkinsons or something with a serious diagnosis. In my mom's case, she just wasn't eating enough and I could remedy that with my time and attention. But if she had something more serious like cancer or more heart disease (she has atrial fib), I think we'd just let it take its course, as my mom has said over and over she's ready to go. Your mom at least is eating pretty well. It's tough however you go. I'm sorry your mom isn't nicer to you, that makes it even harder for you to help in any way. {{Hugs}} to you.
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I am ready to be just a bystander with my parents.... I really can't consume myself any more with my parents health issues.

Sounds like your Mom has accepted being older, wish my Mom would as my Mom thinks there are miracles to help with her hearing and her eyesight.... she wants to keep searching for that doctor that has that magic wand.... [sigh].

I always go into the doctor's office with my parents, otherwise later in the car I can hear them talking about their appointment and I am wondering if they both were at the same appointment that I was :0
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With Mom, the caregiver experience is to be bullied, yelled at, and told to do nothing while demands come all day from the same person!
She has hardening of the arteries and eats pretty healthy actually. She craves exercise even if she walks only a little bit. Mentally she is pretty with it but emotionally like a 4 year old. Also, I notice she doesn't follow jokes, or have patience for more than a few words. She demands to be listened to and talks non-stop about nothing. She can't sit still without her hands moving or playing like a restless 8th grander.
I'm going to look into Parkinson's. If the doctor noticed it I bet he wouldn't tell her knowing she's too emotionally volatile.
I feel guilty that I can't help her but she really won't allow me to.
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Thank you all so much! what a caring group. I am so grateful for you all. I don't know what I would have done for the past 4 years without you.
Mom's Dr is an internal medicine specialist and he has high internet reviews. Mom doesn't let me in to see him with her. She hates if I ask a question or talk to him. She wants total control of his attention. She can't be reasoned with.
Once in a while, the doctor asks Mom's permission if he can talk to me with her and once in a while he'll talk to me aside, but he really hasn't offered anything new or different. He just says, "Well she's not getting any younger."
I ask him about supplements and nutrition and he doesn't know anything and gets nervous if I ask him anything. If I suggest something, Mom yells at me: "Look I'm old and there aren't any miracles for me. I don't want to talk about it."
Mom is independent living and next week she at least moves to a senior community where there are elevators, library, fitness room and things to do. She things she is going to feel different there. Yeah, for maybe a few months. All the while she says, "if I make it there."
Should i just resign myself to a bystander?
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Oops -- I meant doctors might recommend not treating it.
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I had thought about Parkinson's, but figured it would be unusual to show up at such a late age. Also, doctors might recommend treating it even if it was. The drugs used for Parkinson's can have some bad effects -- nausea being the worst I've heard about. The puffy face and weight gain in the stomach made me think of liver dysfunction. But listen to me playing doctor when I have no idea what I'm talking about. :)
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Just a total shot in the dark (since JeanneGibbs as usual has a great answer), but could it possibly be early Parkinson's? Read the symptoms on here, a lot of them match: http://www.helpguide.org/elder/parkinsons_disease.htm

I totally agree with getting her to a geriatrician. But also know that at her age, some docs will just tell you to accept whatever is going on, that at her age, things start to go downhill. That's basically what my 94-year old mom's female internist told me when I took her for her weight loss and desire to isolate herself. I wasn't happy with that answer, so I took matters into my own hands and have put 14 pounds back on my mom. But she wasn't having the kind of symptoms your mom is having. Good luck and keep us posted.
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I don't know, judda. I would keep working on trying to get her in to see the other doctor. Some blood and urine work may give you some idea if something is going on with her heart, liver, or kidneys. Maybe it is something they can fix, so she can feel better. It may be the natural progression of life, but you never know until you look.
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My Mom who is 96 has some of those issues which are general age decline. I remember reading somewhere, when one gets up into advance age, one year is like five years. And I have really seen it with my Mom in the past year.

The puffy face and weight gain in the stomach would be a concern that something is going on.
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Have they checked for the obvious things, like a uti or dehydration?

Do you accompany her to doctor visits? What does doc say about puffiness? The increased sleeping? The tremors? What kind of doctor is her PCP? Is that the MD near you? Has she seen a geriatrician?
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