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Once my mother passes, I will be left with half an income which will not be enough to live in this high rent apartment. I am so worried that I may be evicted as I am unemployed due to caring for my mother on a long term basis. I know when my mother passes, I'll be an emotional wreck although I receive emotional support from a support group I attend. Wait lists for senior housing usually almost always have a 2 year wait period. Any suggestions how to survive between the time of my mother's death and what do I do now that she's gone? I only receive a small SS benefit and am healthy enough to work part time. But your first pay check usually takes 3 weeks to arrive. Thanks for your wisdom.

Essiemarie, every dollar that is not spent on an expensive apartment can be saved.

I would start looking at your budget and looking for a new address. Your rent should not be more than 30% of your net income, 25% is a better goal. I believe that I have read that senior assisted housing is 30% of your income. Ask them what happens when you lose your mom. Make sure that you can either downsize, get a roommate or get a rent adjustment.

I would do a monthly list of all fixed expenses and look at the last 12 months to figure out an average on variable utilities. You can get most necessary utilities set up on annual plans that guarantee that you pay the exact same amount monthly. I would do this if your utilities vary widely from one season to the next.

I would also make sure that you are getting the best prices available on items like phone and internet. I think that the price increases sneak up and we don't realize that a phone call to update services can save us money.

Putting a budget in writing will show you exactly how every penny is allocated and it will help you know what you should be looking at for a rental amount.

I don't know where you live, but would a small trailer in a mobile home park be more economical? Maybe you could purchase something that is parked in a park that you will be able to afford for yourself.

There are lots of options, just getting out of our own box helps.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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EssieMarie Oct 10, 2019
Very wise counsel. Thanks so much!!!
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Ah, Essie...I see this is another relevant question from you...you stirred quite a response with your other question related to finances and funeral arrangements and I just did some research in the past couple hours...I sent you a private message but will share here at least one...that I hope might be of some help as far as final expenses...I learned quite a bit in fact, that my area, CLeveland was apparently the start of organizations that have spread across the country to protect consumers and help with the high costs of funerals. In our case it is called a Memorial Society and one becomes a member for a nominal amount which allows you to have access to basic funeral or cremation services. The Funeral Consumers' Alliance (FCA) has a website www.funerals.org that lists all of the organizations across the country. In your case it is the Funeral Consumers Alliance of Tidewater 757-428-5134. Your local Alzheimer's Assn may be an additional resource for other services and dthat is infoseva@alz.org, 800-272-3900. Hope this helps.
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AlvaDeer Oct 13, 2019
This is so incredibly kind, and this is such valuable information. I kind of hope you will post the above information under funerals or somewhere with your own heading, gdaughter, as I often don't read comments thoroughly and this is information I want on file. You were kind enough to look this up, and it is all incredible information. Others might keep such info for future needs, as I do. Yesterday I was curious about Trust management after death and looked up how to fill out the online IRS form for the executor of a Trust. Out of all the youtube walkthroughs there was one with great info that had also how to avoid a common mistake. And I thought how much information I have learned here on agingcare Forum and how much I still have to learn. Thanks to you and all here who so often go the extra miles. Essie, start a notebook or file now with information for your future, and do get on housing list now.
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Given your previous question, I would move now. Find something for you and your mom that is cheaper. And yes, get your name onto every HUD housing list you can.
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Reply to lynina2
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I would say you should talk to the managers of the building you are living in.
There might be a discounted rent if you ask, or they might have a smaller apartment you could move into when the time comes.

It never hurts to ask questions.
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I would get on lists now. You can always ask to be skipped or you and mom can move so that you are not left high and dry during a difficult period.

A paycheck is the least timely concern, it is finding the job that can be time consuming.
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EssieMarie Oct 10, 2019
Thank you so much for your wisdom. Do you think moving us to a cheaper apartment would help me save money monthly for these kinds of emergencies? I know I'm asking impossible questions but don't want to have a nervous breakdown trying to bury mom and find housing for myself. It's a scary thought.
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I would go to your Social Service Dept in your county. Explain your situation. You my be able to get SSI (Supplimental income) With this u maybe able to get Medicaid Health Insurance. This will include vision, prescriptions and dental. You may qualify for a housing voucher. You will only be required to pay 30% of ur total income. You can get help with electric. Office of aging may have resources u can use.
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I don’t know how it works in VA but out here, if you ask to be skipped when your name comes up for low income housing, they take you off the list completely and you have to apply again the next time the waiting list opens up :(

I think you need to downsize now. Is there any way you can make other arrangements for your moms care? You are sacrificing your own livelihood here.
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Reply to worriedinCali
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Essie,

Put your name on a list for low income apartments that are based on your income. There is usually a wait list so do it now. My cousin did that after her divorce. Also, apply for food stamps. Don’t get expensive things like cable tv.

Someone jump in and help me out here please. Can she get some other service like Hulu or Netflix on their own or amazon?

Grocery shop, don’t eat in restaurants. If you don’t mind me asking your age, can you get a part time job at least?
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gdaughter Oct 11, 2019
Not a tech expert, and that's the catch, but yes there are many ways I understand to get the TV channels. If you have a library card you may be able to access consumer info via Consumer Reports from the library website and they are soon doing or recently did something on this cable stuff. They said how easily we are all being ripped off because intro rates (which may be irrelevant with Essie and mom living in an apt...they may not have a choice of provider or it might even be included?) don't include all you need to really enjoy it...and they said the way to avoid the fees: was to cancel cable.
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You need to find out what your income might be, realistically, and what assistance you might qualify for. The town or county where you live has social workers who can help you identify such assistance. Look in the telephone book. There is usually plenty of part-time work available in a community. Caregivers who need a respite break need people to come in and "Adult-sit" to allow them to leave home for a few hours. You could qualify for such work. Grocery stores need part-time workers to fill in at check-out stands or other tasks while full-time workers are taking leave. Can you do housework? Gardening? Day care assistance? The point of all this is to pull yourself together and get a plan of action to meet your upcoming situation, something you feel pretty sure you can do, and once you have that in your mind, you might find the emotional stress will fade away.
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Reply to PungoMac
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You should put your name on the wait list for senior housing now. If they call you and your mother is still alive she can live with you. Sometimes people get break and an opening occurs sooner than expected.
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