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As a 56 yr old male caregiver to my mother. I would never allow this not bathing. That's just not an option. Its a health concern as much as a "bad odor". I allow mom to do as much as she can (her pvts etc) but the areas she cannot do- I wash etc. I make it as comfortable as possible and as fast as possible without being rushed. Warm bathroom, clothes ready towels ready etc. If and when I can ot do this any longer I will enlist an aide or someone who can. Hygiene is a must.
I'm sorry you are going through this but masking and pacifying is not going to work.
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BurntCaregiver Apr 20, 2024
Well said, Lwayne. Masking and pacifying does not work. Daily hygiene care is a must not just because it's gross when someone smells and is dirty, but because it's a health hazard to them too.
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Air freshener won't work. Body odor and filth isn't an option. It is a health hazard.

If you are unable to care for a senior to the extent that you cannot get him or her to bath or to allow bathing then it is time to consider placement.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I couldn’t accept the refusal and I couldn’t sleep in a room with it. I’d hire a bath aide who’s experienced in the “tricks of the trade” and make it happen
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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Products to mask the stench is not the solution. Finding out WHY your spouse refuses to bathe for weeks IS. Dementia is the most common reason. A full medical and cognitive exam is in order here.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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Air Freshner only masks the order. I would find a way to get this person in a shower. Don't ask. My daughter, RN, tries to make her residents think they have made the decision. "Mrs Smith, wouldn't it be nice to feel fresh and clean and have clean fresh clothes" Hopefully, they say yes.

Is your shower/tub easily accessible? If a tub, there are bars that go over the side. There are handle type bars you can buy that have suction to fit on the wall. A shower chair is good. Handheld shower head a plus. Water warm not hot. The bathroom warm. I used a portable heater to get Moms warmed up.

If you do the washing, suds up real good using a bath spong or puff and then use the shower head to rinse. For private areas, I just had Mom stand up, facing the wall and holding onto the rail, placing her legs apart, I usedva washcloth with soap to clean the rectum area and then used the shower head to rinse the area and the vigina area, I never used soap there. I had a handtowel on the toilet seat and had her sit down there so I could dry her off. I dressed her in the bathroom where it was warm.

In ALs and nursing homes, residents are bathed 2x a week. There are wipes that can be used for in between. Mom has a BO problem so between baths I would wash her underarms and put on deoderant.

Maybe you can see if there is an aide willing to bath ur LO. Sometimes they are willing to let someone else help.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Nothing strong enough for me, I would sleep in another room.
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Anxietynacy Apr 13, 2024
Yupper!
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Bath aide or facility placement, Even if it's not a regular shower. there needs to be regular cleaning, sponge bath, bath wipes--something!

No unbathed spouse-in-the-house.
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BurntCaregiver Apr 20, 2024
There definitely has to be at least daily washing up and clean clothes.
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There are no air fresheners that can solve this problem, but there are options to solve it.

No playing games about hygiene. Its either be showered (or at least washed up) and clea clothes daily or it's placement in a care facility.

You know, when a person gets to the point where they are refusing to be clean that's usually when it's time for nursing home/memory care placement.
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Reply to BurntCaregiver
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Sorry to see this situation. Save your money on fresheners and have your spouse placed in a facility. It is a health hazard.
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Reply to Patathome01
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Actually, if I get to that point, I hope that my Final Exit is imminent! I'm big on cleanliness so it would be a HUGE issue for me if either me or my husband were unable to maintain basic personal hygiene.
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