Hi. My situation is complex and I seek to give a quick summary. Can give details if someone needs more info. I hope someone who knows elder care law in NEW YORK can comment.
My grandparents have been financially separated for years now. My house‘s asset protection will be outside the 5 year medicaid look back come next year. This is a house that my grandfather has refused to pay bills in for 6+ years. He is financially abusive and this has worsened with his Alzheimer’s. I fear for my grandmother's physical and emotional safety. We have been told that getting guardianship may be hard because although he is declining he still drives, and it would be hard to prove he can’t cook for himself. He gets by okay but would deny forgetting ANY basic skills. However he literally can’t remember a conversation for more than 5 minutes. Our doctor has not taken away driving privileges because he would stop going to any doctor at all if he did that. He has had no accidents.
My mom and I have mentioned that my grandfather should live elsewhere since he refuses to pay bills here. This has been met with threats and refusal. There is a second property where he can go that is still in the family. He would not be charged anywhere near regular rent. Just utilities. We know we could get state aid for him too.
A: can we force him to live elsewhere without guardianship? B: if he does live on his own, what would have to happen to make the state force him into a nursing home? We would like to avoid this. C: is it best to let adult protective services advocate for my grandmothers safety in court, stating our case that he needs to leave?