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I take care of my 60 yr old handicapped mother. My sister is crazy & feeds my mom with lies. She told my mom that I called in on her for idk what ? And my mom believes her & took her side. Out of nowhere she started yelling at me & told me to quit doing it. I am a RNA. I work & have friends & don't care what my family members do. I have a life. Neither one of them have a job . They sit & gossip about me all day. My mom's phone goes off 24/7. I know their talking about me. My sister is very jealous of me. I am sober.. I have a good job..friends & my kids are all grown up. My sister has been on drugs for 20 yrs, has no job, got caught defrauding the welfare system. And had 5 little boys she lets do whatever they want. My mom has been in a mental institution while I was growing up as a child. I am very disgusted by these two. I didn't do anything to deserve this . My dad even said my sister is a bad liar. I'm sick of all the unnecessary drama. I'm not into it at all. Never have been.

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My suggestion is to go to a suburban area in one of the higher growth areas for jobs, but look to a less growing area of that city for housing. Right now, we have one of the lowest unemployment rates in history - take advantage of that while you can! Some places may have signing bonuses even.
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Reply to surprise
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Yes I am a nurses & yes I have a job. Moving right now is my #1 priority. I live in a very small area that barely has jobs and housing is scarce. I'm doing everything I can to get the hell away from this very toxic & dysfunctional family.
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Reply to hayleyamberw
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Do the grey rock technique. You can look it up on YouTube. Simply just say and do very little. The fun will stop when there is no reaction from you. They will move on to another victim to pick on.
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Reply to Jasmina
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Is RNA restorative nurse assistant?

You need to figure out a way to leave this situation, detach and then live your life in peace. It is certain that you will not be able to do it where you are.
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Reply to gladimhere
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You said you are a nurse. I have always heard that nurses are needed every where.
What is holding you back form moving?
I would make it my priority to try and move far far away.
If you are not healthy and happy your life is not healthy nor happy.
Look for a job first and if you are accepted then move.
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Reply to HappySadCathy
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I really don't know how to act in this situation. I forgot to mention that I was in a car accident 14 years ago & my 4 yr old daughter was killed. Ever since then everybody in my so called family blamed me. So I told my mom.. this has been going on for 14 yrs. And I'm tired of it. Of course she turned it right back on me. She doesn't see she's the instigator/problem in all of this. I wish I had $$ to move but I dont. This is a very toxic unhealthy family & I'm the black sheep. Any suggestions out there ?
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Reply to hayleyamberw
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Poor sister. Poor nephews. Poor Mom.

Lucky you. It appears that somehow the mental illness in your family spared you. Be very thankful!

But poor you, too, for all the drama their mental illnesses have dumped into your life.

I've never been in your situation. Is it possible to simply ignore the craziness around you and to not respond to it in any way? I would think that would be very hard, but very healthy if it can be done.

If necessary, get some counseling to help you deal with this and to support you in your decisions about it. Not that there is something "wrong" with you that needs to be "cured." Just that you deserve all the support you can get.

One option would be to physically distance yourself from all of these dramatic people. An objective, trained "outsider" can help you decide if that is appropriate.

My best wishes to you!
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Reply to jeannegibbs
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Thank You...
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Reply to hayleyamberw
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Don't participate in the drama. Don't react. Don't defend yourself. Don't give it any attention or energy.

If your mom lives with you and your sister wants to come over to visit her don't be there when she gets there.

Just divorce yourself from all of it.
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Reply to Eyerishlass
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