My 90-year-old mom has been experiencing shortness of breath upon exertion. She hasn't called her doc yet to discuss this symptom. I've called her several times just today to remind her to call but all I get is. "Whenever I get around to it."
Good! Please look for a facility for her where she doesn't have to stagnate at home with a caregiver. It's so nice to see people like your mom interacting with others in a social setting where they're all cared for by pros. Care at home isn't all it's cracked up to be. I speak from experience.
UPDATE: She called me this morning because she was having problems breathing (instead of calling 911). I ended up calling 911 for her. She's has been admitted to the hospital for congestive heart failure and possible other issues. We've been trying to deal with her early stages of Dementia, but she won't accept that there's anything wrong with her. Her Doc spoke with me at the hospital (I do have her medical POA). He stated that she shouldn't be living alone and this may be the chance to get her the help she needs. Unfortunately, we had to wait for an emergency to have an opportunity to possibly place her due to her being unaware of her having Dementia. She's going to be hospitalized for the next few days for treatments and tests. We shall see what happens to ultimately make a decision if she goes home (with having a full time caretaker)or to a memory care unit.
If you have access to her Patient Portal you could message the doctor. BUT do not expect a reply. This is just information that the medical staff would appreciate and will probably discuss with mom at her next appointment. If mom is able to care for herself then back off. 1 call to mom to ask if she called the doctors office is sufficient. (did you like it when she called you several times a day to ask you the same question? I bet not) If she does not have one next time you are out pick up a pulse oximeter. Inexpensive and a good device to have on hand (no pun intended)
For what its worth, true shortness of breath (SOB) is a horrible feeling like suffocating. Were mom truly experiencing a SOB emergency, she'd be on the horn SO FAST your head would spin off, even calling 911 for immediate relief.
If her oxygen level were THAT low, she'd be pretty much incoherent.
I have had SOB issues my whole life stemming from asthma and it's one thing that cannot be ignored, considering our very life depends on taking x number of breaths each minute/hour/day. When a person counts each one, panic sets in in short order.
Leave her alone to make her own adult phone call if and when the situation warrants doing so.
On the grounds that, being short of breath on exertion, she's unlikely ever to feel like getting round to a troublesome conversation with a doctor's office and the palaver of explaining everything, I would offer to call the doctor for her. Ideally, do this in her home with her there to give consent and to answer any questions that you can't.
If her cognitive abilities are intact and you believe that's her genuine response, it's none of your business.
However, if you think she would normally be concerned, then step in and call the doctor yourself. She may not be getting enough oxygen to think clearly and can't really do it herself.
You need to get her to her PCP. This is not age related. If she hasn't been for a while, labs will be ordered. It could be a number of things. Heart comes to mind.
Do you live local to her? Are you her PoA? If you have to call her several times a day just to remind her, the issue may not be stubbornness but short-term memory loss, or feeling overwhelmed, or intimidated from her hearing issues (assuming she doesn't have or wear hearing aids).
You could consider calling 911 and sending them to her home, explaining why you aren't there and that she might refuse help. If no one is her PoA and she doesn't have a diagnosis of cognitive/memory issues in her medical records, then they can't make her go to the ER or receive treatment. After this it may be time to call in APS to report her as a vulnerable adult.
Your answer to the questions will guide what advice is give to you, so please give more info.
She might even have been afraid to see a doctor, go to the hospital; fearing that from there you might place her in MC.
BUT do not expect a reply. This is just information that the medical staff would appreciate and will probably discuss with mom at her next appointment.
If mom is able to care for herself then back off.
1 call to mom to ask if she called the doctors office is sufficient.
(did you like it when she called you several times a day to ask you the same question? I bet not)
If she does not have one next time you are out pick up a pulse oximeter. Inexpensive and a good device to have on hand (no pun intended)
If her oxygen level were THAT low, she'd be pretty much incoherent.
I have had SOB issues my whole life stemming from asthma and it's one thing that cannot be ignored, considering our very life depends on taking x number of breaths each minute/hour/day. When a person counts each one, panic sets in in short order.
Leave her alone to make her own adult phone call if and when the situation warrants doing so.
I have been hospitalized for my asthma. It’s awful.
Is that practicable?
However, if you think she would normally be concerned, then step in and call the doctor yourself. She may not be getting enough oxygen to think clearly and can't really do it herself.
You could consider calling 911 and sending them to her home, explaining why you aren't there and that she might refuse help. If no one is her PoA and she doesn't have a diagnosis of cognitive/memory issues in her medical records, then they can't make her go to the ER or receive treatment. After this it may be time to call in APS to report her as a vulnerable adult.
Your answer to the questions will guide what advice is give to you, so please give more info.