What to do when you have a fixed income, small savings but do not qualify for Medicaid? I’m spending $500/mo for husband's hygiene needs.

1. Is your husband a Veteran? If so many supplies are covered and provided by the VA. Also if he is a Veteran depending on where and when he served he may qualify for a LOT more. Please check with a local Veterans Assistance office.
2. Depending on your husbands other medical conditions he may qualify for Hospice. (It can not hurt to call and ask, no longer is the time on Hospice 6 months or less, my Husband was on Hospice 3 years) Many Hospice will provide incontinence products as well as cream, gloves and other supplies. Not to mention you will get someone in to help a few times a week. And you can request a Volunteer that will come in and stay with him while you run errands or just take a bit of Me time.. (Medicare requires the 5% of the cost of patient care be Volunteer time)

Find something to do that you find relaxing, anything to allow you some brain space. You are clearly completely stressed and this is making being about to prioritise difficult. If you read what you have written, your post is nothing to do with your title which shows how overwhelmed you are.. Please try and make some time for you that will enable you to approach things without the stress and panic.

evita, I read your profile and you both are so young to be going through all of this, plus needing to be there for your 97 year old mother who is in a nursing home. This isn't the type of retirement any of us had planned upon. It's definitely not fair.

I can understand your own feelings especially when diagnosed with a serious illness. Was glad to read that you are now in remission, but the treatment for breast cancer can leave a lot of lasting side effects. Especially those pills one needs to take for 5 to 10 years. I couldn't deal with the side effects any longer so I tossed those pills after 4 years :P And I started eating organic foods, do feel better. Organic corn on the cob is wonderful this time of the year :)

Yes, go see the "Elder Law Attorney", I know I was glad I went. I even had my very elderly parents [also in their 90's] to have all their legal documents updated, as everything they had was older than dirt, and filled with landmines as they didn't use a specialized Attorney in the far past. Anyhoo, an Elder Law Attorney knows the ins and outs of Medicaid, and will guide you.