Wondering what others have done/plan to do if an older caregiver passes away before the dementia sufferer—especially if they cannot bring the dementia sufferer home or live with them?
We worry a lot about this—especially as COVID-19 takes hold in the US, and a good number of our older family members do not seem to be interested in taking precautions from getting sick?
My other brother works full time. He won’t. I did the caregiving for 15 years in my house and burned out. This very question has been in the back of my mind too.
I am not obsessing about it but it is on my mind as well.
Wishing you well during this time. Staying positive yet cautious is the best thing you can do right now. Worrying will wear down your immune system.
The caregiver we are concerned for has had a lot of health issues that are getting worse with stress and overdoing it, and refused to seek help initially. Based on witnessing this play out with friends and neighbors, I had initially been expecting an emergency to happen a few months to a year in the future. Before all these current events, we were trying to lead and empower these folks into finding care for themselves. They turned it down several times (dementia patient definitely has paranoia/fear issues), but seemed to start to come around... Now we are stuck hours away from them, can't visit because of quarantining, and they are not making a lot of effort (as far as we can tell) to get help for themselves alone.
Aside from the one caregiver I am concerned for, we also have several older family members (70s-90s) who decided this was a lovely time to go take a plan trip across the country.
I now believe an emergency will happen in our family in weeks or less. I am not paranoid. When it comes to these things, my instinct is often dead on.
I do intend to be realistic and protect my immediate family from illness and injury during these times. I can't stop others from making self-destructive, harmful and stupid choices that hurt themselves and the people around them, but I would like to do what I can to plan and protect my immediate family from as many of their repercussions as I can.