Follow
Share

We live in a city that has a good bit of traffic and lots of active people. I have a hard time figuring out what to do on holidays, e.g. July 4th or Memorial Day. There are events planned, but Mom doesn't walk well. There are so many people now that you might have to park many blocks away and walk to the event. It's not very practical. I usually just end up getting some barbecue and bringing it home. The only family we have here have their own plans for the holiday that don't include an elderly mother.

What do the people here do on July 4th? I thought it would be fun to start having a barbecue at the house. Alas, I don't know anyone who won't be with their own family. I don't know who I could invite. Man, I'm a bit pitiful. I need some ideas.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
You know, my ex's family are a bunch of bbq/party planners. there is always something on for holidays and they plan in advance. My family has never been from the planners; my brother is always amazed that if he invites us on a Thursday for a Saturday party that my kids have plans already.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I don't think the younger people plan the way we used to when I was growing up. This year most of the younger family members did their own thing, like boating at the lake or going to the beach. So, I planned a little luncheon for my parents and a few of their friends.

We just cooked burgers and dogs, fixings and enjoyed the afternoon. The weather wasn't great anyway. One of the guest stayed 5 hours! So, I think they enjoyed it. My parents like to retire pretty early, so fireworks are out. My dad and I did catch some on tv.

If you are in a large city, there are probably more options for holiday celebrations.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Our companion-lady is divorced, and it was her ex's weekend to have their son. I invited us to her town for their fireworks on Sunday. She fed us burgers, and we played with her dog. Not spectacular, but we enjoyed each other's company, and we weren't lonely.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Hey I love a good party.. Count me in Tacy..
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

MsMadge, it made me think of how time changes things. Just having pie sounds good. I guess we just have to accept the changes in life that keep coming.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My mom threw big parties on the fourth when I was a child and as the years passed and my parents crowd either moved or passed away the holiday was never the same for her so we looked for other things to do - fireworks at the Hollywood bowl or the local park
In recent years when that was too difficult we'd go to an early movie and watch the fireworks in the sky on the drive home
This is her first 4th in memory care and while I expect the facility might do something to acknowledge the day I plan to bring dessert in the evening and sit outside with her and hope to catch a few fireworks in the sky - if she doesn't want to do that well then we'll just have pie
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Pam - we have neighbors like that too. Several homes set off big fireworks that are almost as showy as the professional shows. I gotta admitt that after looking at about five or six I get bored - short attention span! The booming goes on all night - good thing our overly sensitive dog is deaf for the one holiday. But I also gotta admit I think about how expensive it must be to set off those types of fireworks at home - not me - I'm way to cheap to blow my money like that - literally speaking!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

captian and I would have probably been buds...LOL
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Nope, not a lightweight! I was around in the 80s..LOL
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Anytime Pam, hope your not a lightweight lol.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Hopefully I can join you Tacy!!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

The Saturday of the 4th of July weekend we always go to Red Bud for motocross. This Sunday and Monday will be spent up north on the boat or beach. The 4th of July weekend is always drinking and having fun.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

rain we spend every 4th at our house at the river.. and alot of the neighbors set off fireworks, so we can sit the elders on the deck in comfort and watch,, the ones that make it over the trees!! Then we go back and forth into the house to watch the ones from DC on TV ( our local station there as we have no cable) This is low stress for everyone.. but I love the story from Jeanne about Coy!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I live on a lake. Across the lake is a huge park that has a swimming area, rents paddle boats and has a big extended fishing dock. Plus almost all the houses on the lake have their own docks and many people have boats. The first three years here the park had a big fireworks show - set off directly across from me so we'd bbq and watch the show from our deck. Four years ago the sponcer pulled out of the fireworks so unfortunately that's gone. Still the people watching is amazing. I'm pretty much a home body and have never made a big deal of holidays - plus hubby and I are two loners fortunate to have found we like to be alone together- plus Rainman, of course. I gotta admit hubby and I make fun of ourselves as we can see almost every other house on the lake having big parties with lots of people - we joke about how pathetic we are to have no friends - we actually have a few, lol! Anyhow - I really don't mind it this way. I like to think that means I'm content in my own skin.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Jesse, my heart goes out to you. Coy remained his pleasant self, was generally cooperative, and appreciated effort others went to on his behalf. He was a sweetie before the dementia and mostly during the dementia.

My mother is a certified sweetie. Her dementia has not modified that. She takes pleasure in little things. She loves her children. She has no Golden Child. She is very well liked by the nursing home staff.

I feel sorry for people who are taking care of grumps and ingrates. And even if it is the dementia that causes that, it is still hard to deal with. My heart goes out to you.

What I am doing this year on the 4th is watching a parade 30 miles away, with the residents of Mom's nursing home. My sisters will be, too, so we can help Mom and a couple other residents, too.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

The year Coy was diagnosed, in June, he had his most severe symptoms. It really seemed like a very late stage He saw ads for the 4th of July activities and wanted to go. His daughter and I looked at each other. It might be his last one. We were totally new at this. We found a drug store (some distance away) where we could rent a wheelchair and return it that weekend, and the two of us took him fairly late in the evening, after all the bands were done. I had to drive around and find the handicapped parking. One of us stood in lines for food while the other stayed back with Coy. It had rained. The grounds were muddy. Coy had a great place to sit! Barb and I stood the whole time.

We were exhausted. Coy thoroughly enjoyed the evening and we enjoyed his enjoyment.

His health improved. In the subsequent years unless he was having a bad day we went to local events, in his own wheelchair. So every Fourth I now think of that baptism by fire that Barb and I had in taking Coy to a big event.

Even though Coy could walk we used a wheelchair for all events, all trips, all tours. Safer and more efficient.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Thanks, guys. Now I don't feel so bad. I was thinking I should have lots of friends peopling the yard while we were grilling chicken and hot dogs. That's how it was in the good ole days. I lived in small towns in Georgia and Texas, so we could drive right under the fireworks, even at the last moment. In the city it is like negotiating Grand Central to do much of anything. I'm glad they broadcast the fireworks. Not as good as being there, but so much easier.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Today I put on my Canada t-shirt, went for a run, sat and played spider solitaire, checked Aging Care, played some more solitaire, walked to the other end of town and ate a red and white doughnut at Tim Horton's, walked home again and here I am. Not much different than most days except for the t-shirt and doughnut. Pitiful? (sigh)
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

No, your not pitiful, your a caregiver stuck in a rut! Me too! We BBQ nearly every day, so that's not all that exciting either! Lol! We are still in the position that we can leave the Old Man for an hour or two, if we plan ahead, toilet him, and give him snacks, and have the phone nearby. I know that this won't last much longer, but we continue to figure it out as we go along. Feeling a bit pitiful over here too! I want to be a FREE BIRD! HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.