My in-laws live with us. Both in their 80s. MIL has Parkinson’s and has recently recovered from a fall that broke her arm. FIL blames her for getting sick, saying it’s her fault they live with us, mocks her feeble voice although he knows he needs hearing aids and well, when he thinks we can’t hear him he is just a bully to her. She won’t insist he be checked for medical issues and he says he’s fine. Suggestions?

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Why do you think she's in charge?

This is your home and you can make a rule about behavior. "No bullying mom or you will have to find someplace else to live" .

Send his doctor a certified letter outlining his behavior. Ask doctor to be in touch with MIL about what next steps should be.

Look into how you evict someone in your jurisdiction.

If he becomes threatening, call 911 and ask for an involuntary psychiatric hold.

Where is your husband in all this?
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Has this been their way of relating to each other all of their marriage, or did it start recently? Has he always been a bully?
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First thought: this is your husband's issue to deal with.

Second thought: verbal and emotional abuse can't be overlooked. Your husband must not overlook it.

Your MIL can't insist your FIL be checked for medical issues.

If your FIL does have a medical issue that would affect his self-control or his understanding, his opinion that he is fine is worthless.

Your husband needs to take the situation in hand. How would you rate the chances that he will be able to?
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