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My 90 yr. old DEAF FIL lives in an apartment not far from us. His only child, my husband, checks in with him every day for a lot of his needs (shopping, food prep,meds being monitored, laundry, etc). He has trouble moving and sleeps in his lift chair recliner and has a electric wheelchair for outings. He uses a walker to get to the bathroom and lately reduced the amount of times he showers. His mind is OK, being deaf his understanding is extremely limited. I posted this before in another question here. All this attention he needs is draining my husband and anyone who wants to help just can't communicate with him, including me. The doctor doesn't see these problems and tell us he won't get into a nursing home because he is able to care for himself. What are the reasons that a person will be admitted to a nursing home other than being in a hospital first. He won't go to an assisted home which we tried. Thanks to all.

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He does not sound ready for a nursing home. On the other hand he may die of sheer boredom alone at home. Assisted Living is a good suggestion. A little peer pressure to get dressed and mingle would do him a world of good.
The facility will evaluate him, his private MD just certifies that he has no communicable diseases (like TB). Take a tour. Even a one month trial might give your hubby a break. Ask who uses sign, you might be surprised.
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Thanks for your answer. Yes he Only uses American Sign and doesn't really read or write. We tried meals on wheels, but they leave the bags on the floor outside his door and he can't reach it and they make the food in aluminum containers so he can't microwave them, anyway, he didn't like the food. Assisted living requires him to go to the dinning room for meals and he doesn't like getting dressed for that. He has a lot of excuses for everything which doesn't make any sense. He only wants his son and my husband only wants his father to be happy, and so do I, but I think my husband would relax if he was in a safe place having proper care. If they hear it from a doctor that he needs to be placed, that might work, but I needed to know what a doctor needed to know to recommend this.
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Nursing home care is for folks who have chronic illnesses and difficulties with ADLs, like toileting, dressing, bathing. Can you reduce some of the strain with meals on wheels, a laundress, once a week pill set up?

What was his objection to the AL he was in? Does he use sign language?
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