I take care of my 94 year old mother with dementia. For about a month now, she has this unbelievable obsession with going to the bathroom every five minutes. She wears a diaper, but refuses to do anything in it. So when she has to go to the bathroom, I lift her up from her recliner (dead weight) walk her to the bathroom, which takes forever because she is losing the ability to walk (there is a commode next to her recliner which she refuses to use) get her on the bowl and then lift her off and walk her back to her recliner. Within five minutes she wants to go back to the bathroom. She doesn't always do anything, it's just this obsession. My brother and his wife came to visit and when she needed to go to the bathroom, I helped her up and as I was walking her I said to my brother, "Would you believe that I did this 35 times yesterday." He started to yell at me and called me an idiot for talking about this in front of my mother. He says I am emotionally abusing her because she still can somewhat understand. I called him a few choice words and told him to walk in my shoes and see if he has a meltdown every once in a while. Why does everyone judge or give advice when they don't pitch in to help. It reminds me of the people who don't have children telling the one who does how to raise them. Thank you for the opportunity to vent.