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My FIL is not able to make safe decisions yet since the POA is not activated he is the one who decides what he wants no matter what. He thinks he can do everything and yet he didn’t remember that we had a meeting with the ARDC. He was approved for long term family care through Medicaid. If he does what he wants we will be back at not eating anything not taking his medication. Anyway I just need to know what to do to activate POA, what is the process?

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thank you all for your suggestions. i was able to look at my fil poa. it’s an advance directive and it says if he checked yes for admission to a nursing home or community based residential facilities the poa can admit that person without having to go to court. it needs to be done by two doctors or a doctor and a psychiatrist. thank you again for all your help. i don’t know what i world do without you all
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There are different POA for different situations.  SB, you and I are in the same position where our Mothers own farmland and there needs to be an CURRENTLY ACTIVE POA who can take care of farm business if our Mothers ever get sick, are hospitalized, disabled, or are incapacitated in any way (without having to have a "Certificate of Incapacitation" required).  You need to talk to an attorney who is familiar with POA for FARMS!  Since your Brother has basically said, "Good Bye--Don't ever talk to me"; I would suggest that your Mother have the attorney set up her renter as the "Farm Manager with POA privileges so that he can make decisions and sign up for Farm Programs, and other Farm-related activities such as selling of the harvest".  

In regards, to your FIL; that is a different type of POA where your FIL might need to be declared incapacitated...it depends on if it is a "Durable POA" or a "Springing POA". 

You need to talk to an attorney immediately to clarify the POA status of your Mother's POA and your FIL POA.
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i apologize it my post went through but i don’t think so. my mom has had only one cash renter so. of course she said they would be knocking her door down. i guess it’s early but my brother contract expires 10/31 and the renter who is interested i have gone to school with he is a neighbor. his offer is more than fair. my brother was only paying 161 an acre. our neighbor is looking at 225-250. lee went back 10 years to see what the market is doing. all she said is i. plus i am terrified about what happens when something happens to her and we are helping her out every week. i hope this doesn’t sound awful but my husband said he is not going to put any money into the farm if my brother gets everything. again all we want is 10 acres of pasture and my moms money pit. i just need some answers besides ‘you will be surprised ‘ or you will be taken care of. can she just talk. she said something about it will go into a trust and then the cash rent is either equal or he just pays me a percentage. doesn’t anyone know about trusts. my opinion is my brother is done. when he says to just tell me where to send the flowers when she is dead 💀 i know she is fragile but she has to accept reality. i promise we are not after anything. my brother really should have gotten everything except 10 acres and her messy house. you actually probably couldn’t have paid someone to take it. any input or suggestions would be greatly appreciated 😍
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i have to switch to my mom now. she is currently doing okay but i made her go to the foot doctor last week and they found something suspicious where her first ulcer came in 2015. i am really worried that she is going to have to go through another amputation and she will need a wheelchair. she refuses to go to physical therapy.? i told her that her legs would feel so much stronger. then my husband is doing basically everything in her bathroom except new plumbing. well in the mean time my brother contract expires 10/31 lee and i want to get the neighbor who is offering a really good bid. she said they would be knocking down her door. not happening. i really like the renter and he is a friend from school. my husband ran all the numbers she keeps saying she knows she knows she knows. get my drift. then she changed her will and all the tillable land is in a trust. my mom said once he gets paid he pays me. that might work if you are speaking. so i guess everything is in this trust. i am getting nervous about this getting a cash renter and her foot is okay and then getting my fil to an assisted living. sorry to vent been a tough day
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In my case it was actually mom's lawyer who did it because the month before mom went to see her & when mom left the lawyer still didn't know why mom came at all - however this was followed up by the drs at geriatric care with a 'Certificate of Incapability'

But I have been told that as long as his dr sees a need for someone else to make his medical &/or financial desions then you can invoke it - or even if you send a letter to his lawyer & dr that you are doing so that they then have to prove he is capable - tell them they have 7 days to make a protest about it - send this by courier to both places so that you have signatures ... as they say in French 'pointe finale'

But I always made sure I had a paper trail a mile wide to back up my choices especially for the money - I even use a separate bank [mom's] for all her stuff because I use a different one - this is a simple way to keep things separate
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Get a DPOA. It can be #1 either pulled up online or #2 If the state or elder's agent chose to do so, via an attorney for a fee. The elder must provide valid photo ID and the document must be notarized. A copy is then kept at the elder's physician, among others as needed.
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thank you everyone. i really appreciate your input.
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My POA for my husband was immediate upon his signing it years ago, and carefully delineated everything that I was authorized to do. Since it was a "durable" POA, it included the conditions under which I could continue to act for him if he became incapacitated: I needed two doctors' statements and my own statement. I didn't need to do this for several years since nobody asked for it and also he was content to have me handle everything, but then when I elected to appoint an institutional co-trustee to manage our affairs, the trustee required it. p.s. it was easy by then; his doctor who only sees him once a year wrote a statement for me without my having to make an extra appointment, and a neurologist she recommended wrote the second statement letter after meeting with hubby for about 10 minutes because it was so obvious.
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Staffbull18 Sep 2018
thank you. i know for sure his neurologist will do it no problem. of course his doctor retired and he hasn’t seen yet. but it will work out. thank you
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My husband has dementia, age 91. I have a POA that was active immediately after he signed it in front of a notary. I have found there are all sorts of strange places that will not do something because the account is in his name. I have sent a copy of the POA to all of our accounts that are in his name.....water department, cable company, etc. This is a straight POA.....we also have one that is strictly health related, as to sustaining life, etc.
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Read the POA - it will state very clearly what the conditions for activation are. In my mom's case the POA was joint non-severable with my brother. Secondly, had to have 2 doctors sign off and what a mess to get that done. Finally got 2 sign offs in the same office -- but that took a few years because her prior dr of 20 yrs was reluctant to sign and new dr only had seen her 2x and was reluctant until APS stepped in an requested. The joint (w/brother) piece was a nightmare because he lives across country. THe good news - he supports whatever my decisions are; the bad news is that some businesses (bank(s)) wanted him present in person for any changes, withdrawels, etc.! And he couldn't revoke his POA part because my silly parents had it written in that neither of us could revoke and turn over to the other (other than death). THey had no idea how much trouble such a clause was going to be.

I learned on this site to put copy of POA on a zip drive -- which has helped at hospitals, dr, offices, etc. Banks will require the original notarized POA.

The last part -- "when can a POA be undone": My parent's included a clause such that should they have restored "capacity" (they get their mind back, recover from stroke, etc.) such that a doctor would deem them "okay and competent" - then the POA is inactivated until such time as parent/person becomes incapacitated, 2 dr sign offs, etc.
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My parents' specify it is active without any need to determine incapacity. The lawyer we used made it clears that it should be active immediately since my parents are 90 plus years old. So glad we did it that way when we updated their trust!
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I’m having the same issue!!! My brother had fallen and had subdural hematoma and comatose almost 3 weeks. POA for Health was activated. Then he went to long term care for rehab and because I called state inspectors to report his falls with no neuro checks done, Med errors, no dietary assessment (being a tubefeeder) and other major issues. I was the facilities pain in ass!!! So, they had a Psychiatrist assess him and in a five minute interview my brothers POA was deactivated and he is now his “ own person “ but continues with Speech for cognitive and memory loss. What the hell??? Everyone agrees what a mistake this Psychiatrist made
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Staffbull18 Sep 2018
i am so sorry you are going through all this. it’s a mess.?good luck with everything
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You need to read the POA document. The document will tell you one of three things.
1. You need one doctor to declare the individual incapacitated to trigger the POA.
2. You need two doctor's to declare the individual incapacitated to trigger the POA - most common.
3. The document will say the POA is immediate upon signing.

I see in see in some of the previous posts that others have said they just showed the document and had no problems. This can happen but legally if the the POA has not been triggered they should not be doing this!
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I didn't really "activate" my POA status, I just showed the POA document to whomever I had to do business with and they accepted the document.
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I live in NJ and my POA was accepted without any problems. Of course, everyone could tell, Mom had Dementia. People on here have said it needs to be activated in some states. Just contact the lawyer who drew it up. It may just take a letter from him thats its in effect,
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My mother POA document stated that the POA could go into effect if Mom was "disabled or incapacitated" and there was NO mention of having to prove incompetency.  So when Mom was hospitalized and then transferred to a nursing home for rehab therapy and then to the memory care unit, I activated my power of POA by notifying the bank, the insurance companies, the Farm Service Association/USDA that Mom was in the nursing home and then giving them a copy of the POA.

Read your FIL's POA document carefully to see what activities the POA can and cannot do and to see what actions need to be taken to activate the POA legally.  If you have any questions, then contact the lawyer who wrote up the POA document.  Each state has their own POA laws, regulations, and requirements, so you need to follow those also.
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Read the POA. Many times it will state that it will become active with a determination by two doctors that he is incapacitated. My mom's did.
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