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I'm wondering if you can elect a member of the religious clergy to serve as Trustee. They have to answer to a higher authority. . After all, they might be one of the last people you "see" if you are religious.
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To all - think about the experience and capability of those you designate.
Friend of friend designated former pastor as executor. The guy was going to 'give' the house(700k) away to church member/contractor, to detriment of 7 named in will/trust. Guy was clueless and is still working on things after 2 years - too cheap to hire attorney or accountant. My friend's distribution checks have been rejected by credit union because he can't get the name straight. and so on. Executor has minimal money/investing smarts. Because I have real estate knowledge, I stepped my friend through what should be done, referrals + steps to get it done right. She then had to do extra work to inform clueless executor so house was not given away. Thankfully executor followed the lead to some extent and was amazed at what they got for the house. Church contractor was not interested in paying what house was worth - no surprise.

2) Will the person you designate for health care POA have the time + energy required? Does that younger person have family + parents + a job to deal with?
How will helping you impact their lives? How will it impact their relationships with spouses, children, employer/employees? Is it fair to that person you want to deisgnate?

I am in process of interviewing (geriatric) care managers. Hopefully I'll find one that I click with and can designate that company/person as my POA. and friends can cooperate + advise a care manager. I don't have a friend that I want to saddle with the responsibility, not because I don't trust them, but I recognize the toll it will take. I'd rather have them visit me + have a nice time + not increase their stress.
Provide an alternative designee. Your need/situation may come at the worst time in life for other person and may be too much to deal with.

Fiduciaries, daily money managers + CPAs can assist with money management.
And the attorney should specialize in trusts + wills.

Really think about the expertise + burdens you are going to ask others to shoulder. Provide alternatives. Perhaps include a statement that a designee hire an appropriate professional to help them through the process.
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If you don't want to leave the money to family or friends, you might want to consider a charity. It's better than leaving it to the state! At least you get to choose the charity. There are even land trusts, where you can leave your property to a trust for conservation purposes.
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ibeenscammed - remember that most cities have legal aid society that may be able to help, if funds are limited. Many retired attorneys help out this way.
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regarding both the clergy and the legal aid society.....same issues as with family...don't trust blindly....have been burned by both before...I got lousy advice from legal aid societies, who assumed that just because I had public health benefits forgot that also had an education and the potential to develop assets...or partnerships. clergy can be incredibly biased as well, and ones personal end of life choices might not always jive with ones denominational practices or investing options...sometimes they do, and sometimes there are people that actually do right by a person, but I learned to keep my eyes open.
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ruthieruth, what you are pointing out is that there aren't any perfect solutions. I've seen people leave detailed instructions to spouses, who only followed 85 percent of those instructions--and then did what the wanted or thought was best. It all depends on the person, the situation, and your gut instinct. There are many vultures or simply incompetent people out there.
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Ditto RuthieRuth, I have had mixed feelings about clergy. At one point I had very specific instructions. There was a reason for this, and I kept trying to explain, but no one would listen. As it turned out, unbeknownst to me, he had no intentions of carrying out any of my wishes except to take any money I had left for the church. When I discovered that he didn't take anything I said seriously I was furious. In fact, I overheard him saying horrible things about a church employee behind her back. After that I wrote to a central person in the city, someone over his head, saying that the church had discriminated against several members. He was so mad at me, he and his head honchos. They came marching over to my home, and terrorized me. That was something I will never, ever forget, and I have not let them forget, either, much to their dismay. Ha ha.
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