Just had my wife in rehab and they ignored her needs. I had to bring her home to save her from abuses real and imagined.

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I had my parents living in a corporate owned Assisted Living Facility, Brookdale to be exact. It was terrible; all they were interested in was money and how to bill higher rates each month. Everything else was under par; the food, the care, the activities were non-existent, I could go on and on, but you get the drift.

So I found a privately owned ALF that is 1000% better; the rates are lower (believe it or not) and the service is SO much better, the food, the activities, the entire atmosphere is more like a nice hotel than an elderly residence. The difference between night & day, in reality. The ED has been there for 6+ years, and so has his assistant, the charge nurse, same thing...........many of the aides have been there for years as well. Normally, the turnover in these places is HUGE so that's something to ask when you tour a facility: How long has the ED been there? How about the nurses? Ask the RESIDENTS how they like living there. THAT is how you find out if an ALF is a good fit, because the sales director will tell you there's cherry soda in the water fountains.

Find a privately owned facility, that's my #1 suggestion, where you can actually speak to the staff w/o having to call 800 phone numbers to speak to Corporate.

If your wife needs a Skilled Nursing Facility instead of an ALF, meaning her care needs are too great for Assisted Living, take every care when seeking one out. Use the above mentioned tips as well. When my mother (93) was in a Skilled Nursing Facility for rehab, the place was HORRENDOUS even though it was highly recommended by Medicare. That rating means NOTHING; ignore it. Get a feel for the place YOURSELF before making a decision. I had my mother moved out of the first SNF and into a second one to finish out her rehab stint and the difference between the two places was again, night & day. In fact, when she runs out of money to continue living in her private pay ALF, she will move into that Skilled Nursing Facility she went to for rehab, that's how much we both liked it. I will then apply for Medicaid to fund her life there.

If you do move your wife into residential care of any kind, you can't expect perfection no matter WHERE she lives. That's important to remember. Call lights are not normally answered immediately, and it can take 10 minutes or more for an aide to show up. Everyone complains about the food no matter how good it is, too, it's the law. In the 6 years my folks have been in residential care, I have seen no abuse to either of them (dad passed in 2015 and mom is in Memory Care now at the ALF). The only abuse I get to see is from the residents towards the staff, truthfully. They can be be gruesome at times. But again, do YOUR homework before signing off on a care home, and then always visit and make sure you do your due diligence. If something seems 'off', you call them out on it. You stay on top of your wife's care b/c everyone needs an advocate, period, no matter where they are, even (and especially) in the hospital or rehab.

Wishing you the best of luck!
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I sat with a family friend in one. The staff tried, but they couldn't get to all the call buttons in a timely manner.
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I answered this on your other post.

I replied that I felt with your wifes health problems that an AL may not fit. To me, she needs skilled nursing and that is not done at an AL.

What do you feel that rehab didn't do for your wife.
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Facilities are individual, just like people. They have to be evaluated one at a time
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Did you file a formal complaint with the rehab facility?

I think you and wife would benefit from an ALF. Pay several visits and ask questions about how they would meet your needs and, in light of you and your wife's health concerns, how do they handle emergencies? Some ALF are very good but you have to pay a personal visit. ALFs can provide all meals, medication management, housekeeping, etc., and all have 24/7 RN presence.
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There is not one answer that fits all.

You really have to do your research to ensure that you find a place that gives a care.

Rehabs are the same way.

Have you called the local counsel on aging in your area to find out if you can get some assistance in finding a place.

If you or your wife like activities I recommend a place that offers lots, if you will not utilize a service provided then it makes sense to find a place that doesn't offer them as they do come with a price.

Most importantly, talk to the people living there. Find out what they think of the place and how they like the services, including the food.
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