My mother wants to live independently, yet have me assume all the responsibilites for her to live independenly in her own home. I live an hours drive and have responsibilites of my own. She doesn't want to hire any outside help, which she can afford. My sister takes her shopping, but my mother would not think of asking her for any additional help it would be too much for my sister. The other two sisters live too far away. My mother expects me to take her shopping for gifts that my far away sister wants to buy her. I have build so many barriers, limited my contact and yet she still has these expectations. I have even told her I cannot assume so much of her needs. She has backed off, but the minute I give her an inch she is back to her requirements for me. What am I to do with a mother who has no dementia and just seems to ignore what I have say to her and continues to try and use me? How do I get through to her without being disrespectful? I am at the end of my patiences dealing with her continued expectations, yet I don't want to disown her. Her rational about paying for unnecessary outside care or getting outside help doesn't cut it with me. She is in a far better financial situation than I am.