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Joyce, has the home visit happened yet? How did it go?

No one was suggesting that you said you were going to be less than honest. I think the poster was making a general statement about folks who try to make their loved ones look better than they actually are; that can cause problems down the road.

Hooe you are well.
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It's my understanding the home visit is simply an assessment both to make sure the LO (in this case you husband) get's the right placement and they have all the services and surroundings he needs to make the transition successful. There is no guarantee everything will be right and easy from the beginning but an at home assessment gives everyone the tools to create the best possible chance it will, this seems so much better to me than having to work out more of the kinks after he has been moved. When a patient comes from the hospital all the facility really has is the hospital records to tell them about what their new resident needs and that's fine but if they can learn more about them in their home environment it sure seems like a better set up for everyone to me. It is important they see the way he functions at home, the real every day so they are best prepared to make this as easy as possible on him as well as you. Nothing to worry about or be afraid of, in fact if they know all of the things you do for him throughout the day and his routine they will be better able to keep it as similar as possible for him when he transitions.
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Joyce, let us know how it goes. The folks on Aging Care are very sweet to help people with any problem that comes up. I don't know what I would have done without their support over the last 7 years. ❤️
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I would strongly suggest you do NOT try to make your father look better or more competent.   You do not want your father placed in a facility that cannot manage his care, and if the facility charges more for additional services, you want an understanding of that.   Some ALFs will have additional fees if more services needed.  Good luck.
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NYDaughterInLaw Jan 7, 2020
It's her husband not her father.
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I wish I could help you in some way, but don't have experience.  I can't imagine how difficult it is being in your shoes.  I hope the process goes as smooth as possible for you. I am a CPA if you ever have any tax questions, feel free to message me.  My heart goes out to you.
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It sounds like the AL/MC staff are planning to visit your home to assess your father’s needs so the center can identify what sort of care he will need when you place him.

I wouldn’t worry about it. A RN will probably make the visit. It’s pretty routine.
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Sounds like a good deal to me, and nothing to fear... Please let us know what they say.
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Joyce, congratulations on getting a home visit scheduled! Can you please respond if it’s for memory care, assisted living, or a nursing home? What they look for will be different, but regardless a nurse probably will be the visitor. They will determine if he’s a good fit for what they provide. They’ll look for his mobility, may do a little memory assessment, see just how he functions and if he may need more or less than they provide. This is a good thing, don’t be scared. It’s a step forward and you’ll have much more good information by the time they leave. Let us know how it goes.
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joyce78 Jan 6, 2020
My husband has Dementia....I have been his caregiver for the past year...last 6 months have been a hard time for me ...he likes to wander...mad at me for everything......I just can't do this anymore hope to get him placed ..it is a very nice place.....small town and know most everyone that works and Lives as a Resident.
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We had a home visit for my mother before she went into Memory Care. The facility offered Assisted Living and Memory Care in 2 separate buildings so the visit was to evaluate my mother for placement into the right place. I felt it was to our benefit as much as theirs in order to make sure it wasn't a situation they couldn't handle. In other words, making sure they were a good fit for her in addition to it being what my mother needed before she moved in. Nothing to be afraid of.
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Joyce, dear, where is your husband right now? And what is scaring you?
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joyce78 Jan 6, 2020
I was scared in the beginning ...taking care of my husband .he is still home..the visit is from the home where I hope to place him ...
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Joyce, you need to “flesh” out your question with a few more details, whatever you are comfortable sharing. What sort of home visit are you writing about? Who is making the visit? Anything you can add would be helpful.
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joyce78 Jan 6, 2020
Hoping to place him ...so they are visiting here ..just wonder what to prepare for...he has been in a mood ...most days he does not like me or Anything I say.
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Waiting to place him
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shad250 Jan 6, 2020
THank you. It would probably see what he can and can't do as well as his mental health capability then discuss with you the best course of action
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Regarding discharge from hospital, or Nursing home? Or?
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joyce78 Jan 6, 2020
Waiting to place him
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