I have told them a thousand things she does and that she cannot climb stairs. Her bathroom is on the upper level. She does dangerous things like leaves the stove on and burns things. She is not safe. Three trips to the ER this year. Always gets discharged home. She lives alone. What can I do?
You have to say that your loved one is an unsafe discharge over and over until the hospital does their job and gets your loved one placed in the appropriate facility.
And DO NOT under any circumstances fall for the lies about what they can all do for you if you take your loved one home.
Instead...stand strong and keep saying unsafe discharge, and that she cannot return home. Period, end of sentence.
Is this a hospital discharge?
If this is a hospital discharge, tell them you will file "unsafe discharge" against them. reporting them to JCAHO (Joint Commission on Accreditation of Hospitals.
If your mother is competent mentally to decide to go home and the hospital physical therapists and doctors feel she is able to do so, there is little you can do here. Be certain mother has a fall assistive device to call 911 if she should fall. Eventually she will be so badly injured that she will be recognized as unable to return home.
Even if you are POA, you cannot change the decisions (no matter how poor they are) if your principal (mom) and her agents (doctors, nurses, social workers) believe she can manage. The choice is with them, not you. Sadly.
So you are limited, if your mom is competent.
1. You can speak with the social workers telling them your concerns.
2. You can speak to the doctors telling them your concerns
3. You can report to JCAHO that the hospital is knowing sending home a person who is not safe on her feet for discharge.
4. You can call APS for wellness checks.
5. You can make the situation as safe as you are able
That's about it. Then await the disaster.
During these few days I found out that PT or OT did an assessment saying my mom could walk 40 feet. She had never even gotten out of bed.
This is an uphill battle that repeated over and over again with every hospital or rehab stay. I agree with the poster above that you need POA to legally advocate for mom. My heart goes out to you ❤️
First, get your mother to agree to give you power of attorney. This requires a talk with a lawyer. What you do next depends on the money situation. You can hire sitters for mom, or move her to assisted living. In-home help is more expensive if it's around-the-clock.
Some of us had to wait for an emergency to happen. Sad, but true. Our parents have the right to say "no" to us, and it's easier to move them into a facility if they've broken a hip or if they got picked up by police for wandering down the highway.
It's a tough time. I hope your mom doesn't make it harder for you.
As BlueHeron suggested, you should ideally try to convince her assign you as her PoA. You can do this easier, faster and more conveniently by downloading the paperwork from sites like Legalzoom.com and Rocketlawyer.com, to name a few. I did this for both my MIL and Mom. You will have to finalize it in front of a notary, and this can be done at her bank (most states require 2 non-family witnesses, which are almost always bank employees). Make the PoA durable, so that she doesn't need an official diagnosis for the PoA to become active.
Once this is in place, then you create a medical portal for her at her clinic and request an exam with a different primary doctor with the specific purpose of giving her a cognitive exam. Explain the symptoms you are seeing. Tell them you also want her tested for a UTI.
At the exam, bring the PoA paperwork for them to put on file. Then ask for the HIPAA Medical Representative form and have your Mom assign you. This way the doctor can discuss her private medical information with you without her having to be present or give permission.
If she lands in the ER then you will need to go the "unsafe discharge" route like others have suggested. And yes, the hospital discharge staff will bold-face lie to you about providing help at home if you just take her back there. They won't. Been there, done that.
Sorry about your mother's situation, but she is no longer safe at home without supervision. Follow good advice from our forum.
Who is this medical professional? Take her to her doctor or get another opinion. A social worker should also assess her condition. Perhaps there will not be a next time by hiring home help or admitting Mom into a faciilty
Sorry, it’s Unsafe Discharge and she should not return home alone. She is unsafe living without supervision. So, I think her doctors are wrong. Perhaps she requires a social worker to get her place and her competence assessed for home safety. She cannot use stairs and leaves the stove on unattended.
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