We continue on the slow crawl to prep my mentally ill, narcissistic 75 yo mother for major surgery. I’ve posted here before about her showing up at my door after 10 years, looking for help. She’s about to sign immediate POA. First round was springing POA and elder law atty I consulted after said I needed immediate. So that’s about to happen. She’s agreed.
My current worry is she has two safe deposit boxes she co owns with a sick, elderly herself friend. The bank says POA will not get me in a box she joint owns w another person.
This person is almost housebound, but willing to come in person as the bank requires to take her off box. The bank also offered that we could close both boxes and open a new one.
Now mother is questioning doing this, because my name will be on her stuff.
I’ve so far been hesitant to put my name on anything of hers, since she applied for community Medicaid without disclosing the bonds or her very small IRA or the bonds. She did this before I was involved. So that’s biting me in the backside so to speak.
So tell me, what happens if I can’t get access to her boxes (one has bonds she says) and I need to apply for nursing home Medicaid? I know I have to list the boxes. I’ve never seen the bonds she just says she has them, about 4K worth she thinks.
There doesn't seem to be much to money to worry about and if the bonds are over 30 years there is no interest paid on them anymore so you will be paying to store them for no reason.
Go there with the other person, get them out, leave without any fanfare and then close the box at a later date.
In truth, taking on POA for your Mom this is only the beginning, I suspect, of the problems involved. I sure do wish you very good luck with all of this. It is more than I would want to handle to be certain. It is every so much easier for the state to manage these problems than for a single POA dealing with things this complicated.
You have good suggestions below and I hope one of them works. And again will wish you good luck.
In most cases items kept in a safety box could easily be kept in a safe in your house. (much easier to get to in case items are needed)
(do not forget to check your State's list of Unclaimed Property. Everyone should do this at least 1 time a year. Banks turn items over to the State if boxes have been "forgotten, abandoned")
Take your mom's friend up on the offer to meet you at the bank.