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My Father in law called wanting us to buy them a new house or give them $5,000. immediately and 1500$ a month. What? We live on a very modest income. We are diy people , drive old cars etc. They have been terrible with money. My husband and his brother told FIL to sell house but dementia ridden. MIL won't let anyone in the house.( she has had no treatment ,won't go to the Dr.,leave the immediate area, and is abusive to FiL) . We've been told to stay out of their medical and financial business for years even though we've tried and tried. My husband wants POA before they get one dime since they can no longer be trusted. Is this a reasonable request ? If they refuse which is likely will they be homeless?

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MissLauri, usually elders will move to senior apartments where the monthly rent is based on their income... even if their only income is social security.

Whatever you do, don't hand over one thin dime to your husband's parents. Otherwise you will become their ATM machine on a regular basis. You need the money for your own immediate family and for your own retirement.

Having the in-laws Power of Attorney won't stop them from useless spending. Plus the POA doesn't come into play until Dad-in-law is unable to think clearly for himself. I think it is too late for Mom-in-law to sign any legal documents due to her serious dementia.
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If they are foreclosed upon, Adult Protective Services will be called. In your shoes, I would CALL APS and alert them to the fact that these are vulnerable adults who are resisting help. Sadly, they will likely become wards of the state and placed. Your husband is correct, you should not give them money. Work with APS on getting the best placement possible.
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