What does Medicare cover for aging help? My mom lives on social security and Medicare with no savings. We have two teenagers about to head to college and cannot take on paying for her care as well.
She has no plans for her long-term care as she ages, other than assuming I'll take care of her. She had a stroke 3 years ago but recovered. Still no planning! She will not discuss her finances with me. I'm terrified that she'll have another medical issue and we'll be forced to put her somewhere that's gross. What can I do to begin planning on her behalf?
Medicare will not pay for long term care in a skilled nursing home, or for assisted living facility. Although, Medicare does cover a certain number of days in skilled nursing if she is discharged from a hospital and still needs to recover/rehab.
If she has limited income and no assets, she can apply for Medicaid. You can probably help with this process. Medicaid will help pay for long term cares. They will also pay for things like incontinence supplies and mobility aids. They will determine the amount she pays, called a spend-down amount, which is like a monthly deductible; her income is used first to pay for her needs, and Medicaid will pay the remainder for eligible expenses.
And, while you are planning ahead, schedule tours of several nursing homes. Meet with the Admissions Director and ask questions. They will gladly show you around. Take a look at how the residents look, and also take note of how the staff looks. Is it calm, well-run, organized, clean? Do they seem short staffed; is there chaos and tension?
Seeing a few will help you choose the one you feel will best suit your mother's needs.
I would suggest touring without her first. Rule out any that look horrible! You don't want her to see those places! Find someplace that looks nice and welcoming then take her there for a visit, maybe have lunch there, if that is allowed.
If you are comfortable with her living with you, at least for now, Medicaid also has a program that will pay a live-in family member for certain cares at home, if she qualifies. But, recognize when her care needs become more than you can manage.
It will not pay for companion services or for someone to elder-sit someone.
Here's what's not the plan for her Long Term Care. YOU. She will have to go into a LTC facility. They will take her monthly income and if she has assets in her name like a house, it will have t be sold and the proceeds spent down on her care.
Your mother is like so many other seniors. They think that by not discussing anything with their kids, not making any plans, or being secretive about what they have that this behavior will somehow result in their adult kids simply becoming their caregivers.
You do owe your mother one thing though. You owe her some plainly stated language that cannot be misunderstood that you will not for any reason become her caregiver, move her in, move to her place, or pay for any of it. Make sure she understands this. Then offer to help her make some plans. If she refuses, she's on her own.
If she's poor, she isn't going to land in a high-end nursing home or AL. That's how it is and there's nothing you can do. Please don't bankrupt yourself trying to.
You can’t do much planning on her behalf, although coming here and learning about what others in similar circumstances are doing is a great step!
It sounds like she hasn’t made you her financial POA. That’s a huge mistake on her part. She should assign a proper medical decision maker/ mPOA and a financial POA. Failing to do this is making a choice, and that choice is to become a ward of the state with a court appointed guardian in the future. You would be right on to let her know that’s what she is actively choosing, if she fails to make other plans.
If and when you become her financial POA she needs to provide you with the information you might need. If and when you become her medical POA she needs to create a care plan, often called a POLST or living will, where she states her medical wishes in an official format.
Good luck, you’re smart to learn as much as you can before you need it.
Also if you call Medicare or talk to a Social Worker at Senior Center it may be possible that you mom may qualify for Medicaid.
And lastly if mom will not discuss her finances and therefore I presume you are not her POA your hands may be tied and you might have to wait until there is some urgent matter that forces action.
Much in medical care depends upon many things. Whether or not you are part of an advantage plan is one of those things. While medicare can provide some in home care, it doesn't in most advantage programs which monitor their own in home care. You would be needing Medicaid. That varies by the states.
You will be busy researching for some time for your own state, but do start with Medicare who care refer you to a phone number to check with Medicaid in your own state. Do call also your local Council or local Agency on Aging. They can give you number and ideas where to begin.
Wishing you best luck.