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She wouldn't accept help at her home, was verbally abusive, had medications confused, wanted to drive despite vision issues, and at 88 years old thought she could take care of disabled wheelchair son. She can't remember that she couldn't do everything. She hates us all for moving her and insists she'll be fine back at home.
Conversations go round and round no matter how we try to direct them into positive ideas about participating in activities, getting involved at her assisted living home.
Antidepressants made her drowsy and affected sodium, AST, negatively.
She calls family 8-10 times a day. I answer 1x, try to talk about something good (grandkids, family), etc. and then end conversation. It is a frustrating and sad call.
She has some sort of doctor/lab appt almost every week. Family visits her 3 to 4 times/week.
What else can I say or do?

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If your Mother keeps asking when is she coming home or wants to come home, just don't answer that question, and talk about something else. Talk about the grandchildren, the lovely day anything except that particular one. All the best, Arlene Hutcheon
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Most assisted living facilities have a visiting MD, so I don't see the point in dragging her out for weekly appointments. Ask the director of nursing.
Don't give up on the antidepressants, either. Try a different medication and give it time to kick in, at least a month.
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Mamarosa, moving an elderly parent isn't always easy. So many refuse to leave their home and there is nothing that you can say to get them out the front door.

Since Mom newly placed in Assisted Living, she need more time to get use to her surroundings. It's is quite common to hear an elder complain and say they want to go home. But when you are not looking, they could be enjoying themselves at activities, etc.

Visit Mom on unscheduled times, thus catch her by surprise, to see what she is doing. Have the rest of the family do the same thing. Could also be the family is visiting too much. Set aside one day, like Sunday for everyone to visit her. She really needs to bond with the facility but she won't if family is always there.

I use to visit my Dad every day, then I cut it down to every other day, then to once a week when I delivered supplies for him. Dad's memory wasn't as sharp so he didn't remember the last time I had visited.

Why so many doctor appointments? Are all those appointments really necessary? Or is this Mom's idea so she can get out of the facility for awhile?
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