I would be very careful about trying to get them to live with someone. I don't know the details of what level of physically disabled and dementia your parents have but if they need a lot of help, it will likely be too much for a family member to deal with.
Are they getting any in-home services? If not, line that up right away.
Do they own a home? Can it be sold and maybe they could go live in an assisted living facility?
If you read this forum a little bit you will read a lot from people who are overwhelmed with being caregivers. It is a LOT of work. Your home is no longer your own. It puts a lot of stress on the family. It can be done, of course, but go into with eyes wide open and with help in place from the beginning. Boundaries set. So that the caregiver can maintain something that resembles a normal life and keep at least some of their sanity.
If they are incapable of living on their own, are your and/or other family providing a lot of help at home? As other poster stated, eventually, there will be an event that will lead to a hospitalization and then maybe rehab and then maybe a facility that is appropriate for the patient.
I could not agree with you more. It is a LOT of work. They have a home and refuse to sell. Yes, I am providing a LOT of assistance. I thought at the rate of decline they’re headed for being with a close family member might be doable. We are considering a living arrangement that keeps us in separate quarters on the same property. I pray they comply Thank you for the well wishes!
The one with dementia isn't really competent to make that decision. The other one (as well as the one w/ dementia) doesn't want to give up their independence or face change, and that's perfectly normal.
All you can do is keep talking to them about it or sadly, wait for the crisis and hope it isn't life-threatening.
If this person is dependant on someone with memory problems, they may be in danger of neglect or harm. Can they phone for help in an emergency?
It is common for couples to protect each other & some cope quite well as a team. But the problems get real when one gets ill.
How advanced is the dementia? Would this parent phone for help in an emergency?
I know of 2 cases of falls where (due to cog decline) the partner has not raised the alarm. Hopefully they are not at this level yet!
Are they getting any in-home services? If not, line that up right away.
Do they own a home? Can it be sold and maybe they could go live in an assisted living facility?
If you read this forum a little bit you will read a lot from people who are overwhelmed with being caregivers. It is a LOT of work. Your home is no longer your own. It puts a lot of stress on the family. It can be done, of course, but go into with eyes wide open and with help in place from the beginning. Boundaries set. So that the caregiver can maintain something that resembles a normal life and keep at least some of their sanity.
If they are incapable of living on their own, are your and/or other family providing a lot of help at home? As other poster stated, eventually, there will be an event that will lead to a hospitalization and then maybe rehab and then maybe a facility that is appropriate for the patient.
Good luck.
All you can do is keep talking to them about it or sadly, wait for the crisis and hope it isn't life-threatening.
You then work with the discharge planners at the hospital to get them into a safer place.