From your profile, I feel bad. Your husband seems so young to have so many problems. But it is what it is, right?
I can see why him wanting help and not being able to tell you what he needs is annoying. My mom is similar to that. At least on the not being able to explain what she means front. I just try to be OK with the lack of info and assume that when/if she thinks of what she needs/wants, she'll tell me.
I guess you just have to expect him to say this and try not to let it get on your nerves. He may not mean it literally but doesn't know what else to say or how to explain. If there's nothing obvious that needs doing, then don't worry about it.
I agree with Grandma1954 that you just need to reassure him that he's ok and safe, and that you're right there by his side. You know that he will only continue to get worse, so if he's already getting on your nerves, I hope that you have hired some outside help to come in a few days a week to give you a much needed break. Don't forget that you are important in this equation as well, and that you need to take care of yourself. Even if it's just for a few hours a couple days a week, you will be amazed how just getting away from the situation can rejuvenate your soul. My husband(who had vascular dementia)when first coming home from the hospital after almost dying from aspiration pneumonia, and was completely bedridden, would call my name constantly. We live in a one story small house, and I would always tell him when I was leaving the room and for what, but he would still call my name. It too drove me crazy, until someone in my caregivers support group, shared that he was probably just scared, and wanted to know that I was there and wasn't going to leave him. Once I understood that, it no longer drove me crazy, and over time he stopped calling my name so much. And I've shared this on this forum before, but since my husbands death in Sept. 2020, I have heard him call my name several times, and now when I hear it, it brings me comfort and peace. Interesting how something that once drove me crazy, now brings me comfort. Please make sure that you're taking time to do things that you enjoy, as that will help you in the long run on this journey you're on with your husband. God bless you.
He wants to be safe. He wants to know you will be there when he needs you. When he says "I need help" try any of these responses. "I love you, you are safe" "I understand you are afraid of what is happening. I get scared sometimes myself" "I need help too, can you help me...." and give him a task to do. fold towels, sort socks, dry dishes...
I can see why him wanting help and not being able to tell you what he needs is annoying. My mom is similar to that. At least on the not being able to explain what she means front. I just try to be OK with the lack of info and assume that when/if she thinks of what she needs/wants, she'll tell me.
I guess you just have to expect him to say this and try not to let it get on your nerves. He may not mean it literally but doesn't know what else to say or how to explain. If there's nothing obvious that needs doing, then don't worry about it.
You know that he will only continue to get worse, so if he's already getting on your nerves, I hope that you have hired some outside help to come in a few days a week to give you a much needed break.
Don't forget that you are important in this equation as well, and that you need to take care of yourself. Even if it's just for a few hours a couple days a week, you will be amazed how just getting away from the situation can rejuvenate your soul.
My husband(who had vascular dementia)when first coming home from the hospital after almost dying from aspiration pneumonia, and was completely bedridden, would call my name constantly. We live in a one story small house, and I would always tell him when I was leaving the room and for what, but he would still call my name.
It too drove me crazy, until someone in my caregivers support group, shared that he was probably just scared, and wanted to know that I was there and wasn't going to leave him.
Once I understood that, it no longer drove me crazy, and over time he stopped calling my name so much.
And I've shared this on this forum before, but since my husbands death in Sept. 2020, I have heard him call my name several times, and now when I hear it, it brings me comfort and peace. Interesting how something that once drove me crazy, now brings me comfort.
Please make sure that you're taking time to do things that you enjoy, as that will help you in the long run on this journey you're on with your husband. God bless you.
He wants to know you will be there when he needs you.
When he says "I need help" try any of these responses.
"I love you, you are safe"
"I understand you are afraid of what is happening. I get scared sometimes myself"
"I need help too, can you help me...." and give him a task to do. fold towels, sort socks, dry dishes...