I live across the country from my family. My mother in law is combative if anyone except my father in law comes in the house to help her out. She will fight going to a new doctor when we feel the current one isn't helping. She cannot make simple decisions about what to wear, what she wants to eat. She will choose to go out with my FIL, adn then get there and start yelling that she didn't want to go out and she wants to go home. I have been trying to get a geriatric doctor for her, and been trying to find someone to come in and help her out but it is all met with fights. She will get to the doctor and refuse to talk or tell huge stories.
She has told me the exact same story 5 times in one 30 minute phone conversation. She is not able to cope with being at the supermarket or mall for more than a few minutes and then has to leave and go home. She gets tired very quickly. She is on medicine for Alzheimers, but we dont think she has it, but refuses to go to the doctor.
What can we do to get her to go to a doctor, and how do we get someone to help her at home when she wont let them in the house?